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Funny backyard quotes

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

2 months ago

I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

3 months ago

I like to scan my backyard every hour with a high power flashlight to let my neighbors know I won’t tolerate any weirdness around here.

3 months ago

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

3 months ago

I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.

3 months ago

I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.

3 months ago