Funny massage quotes

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Whoever has my voodoo doll, can you give it a really good massage?

  Commentary:
  "Please add some hot stones and cucumbers to the mix! My back has been hurting since 2019! 😂🪄✨"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: In a massage chair at the mall just moaning really loud.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like someone found a whole new level of zen at the mall! 🧘‍♂️💆‍♂️ Just hope they don't start a trend of 'moaning' as the latest relaxation technique! 🤣 #MallZen"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, getting fired from a massage parlor for rubbing people the wrong way? That's quite the twist 😂 Maybe they just couldn't handle your unconventional 'deep tissue' technique 🤔 Keep those massages strictly PG next time! 💆‍♂️💼 #RubbedTheWrongWay"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I’d be a terrible masseuse. After 5 minutes, I’d be like, “Okay, my turn.”

  Commentary:
  "Oh, the ultimate twist in spa history! The massage therapist becoming the massagee 🤣💆‍♂️ Who knew self-care could involve such a role reversal! #MassageTherapistGoals"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: A massage is not enough, I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a massage when you can be kneaded and rolled like a ball of dough? 🍝😂 Get ready to be transformed into a delicious lasagna with that kind of treatment!"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Tensing up so the masseuse doesn’t win.

  Commentary:
  When you just can't relax during a massage because you're determined to outmaneuver those sneaky knots like 💪😅 #MassageWars #TenseAndWin

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Massage therapist asked how I felt about chiropractics and I told her the guy who invented it says he learned it from a ghost, and that shut the conversation down pretty quick.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like that ghostly inventor really knows how to crack some spines and haunt some skeptics! 🔮👻 #SpookySpinalAdjustments

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  6 months ago

  Share →: You ask for a Swedish massage and then get mad when I roll meatballs on your back.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew a massage could turn into a Swedish food fest? 🇸🇪🍝 Next time, specify 'hands only' for your own sake! 😉"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I need a massage for my brain.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, a brain massage is the perfect remedy for those hard-to-reach knots of information and stress! 🤯💆‍♂️ Let's work those neurons and give your brain the relaxation it deserves! Who knew mental tension could be so therapeutic?"

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