Commentary:
"When you can't handle the greatness! 😎📱 #YourProblemNotMine"
571 Funny media quotes
Unfollowing girls on Instagram as soon as they get a boyfriend is something I’ll never stop doing.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'Now You See Me, Now You Don't' technique! 😂👻 #UnfollowRoutine"
Not now, honey. I’m talking to strangers on the internet.
Commentary:
"Just networking my way through the chaotic web of strangers… 😂🌐 #Priorities"
I changed my Facebook name to “Benefits.” Now, when people add me, it says, “You are now friends with benefits.”
Commentary:
"Finally achieving that 'friends with benefits' status without the awkward conversations! 😂👏 #LifeHack"
It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.
Commentary:
"Totally agree! Just texted Batman about it 😂🦸♂️🎤"
I received a DM telling me that I’ve offended some of you. I’m truly sorry; I meant to offend all of you.
Commentary:
🤣 "Sorry for the oversight! Next time, I'll send out a personalized 'offense' card to ensure nobody feels left out! 💌🙈"
Adulthood will turn Gmail into part of your social media routine.
Commentary:
"Adulting level unlocked: Reading emails is my new 'daily scroll'! 📧😂 #InboxInfluencer"
Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.
Commentary:
"😂 Just realized my calling might be therapist avoidance instead! 🏃♂️💨 #EmotionalEscapeArtist"
I don’t wanna brag, but my posts are unpopular on all continents.
Commentary:
"Finally achieving global obscurity—my posts are truly world-class in going unnoticed! 😎🌍👻"
Who needs dystopian fiction when you can watch the news?
Commentary:
"Why bother with thrillers when the news is already a full-length horror comedy? 🎥📰😂 #RealityShow"