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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Don’t cry because it’s over. Cry because you have an extra hour to think about it.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Hug your children as often as you can. They can’t break things during this time.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

My husband has reached an age where he reads the menu out loud. The whole menu. And then he has questions. Please send help.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

In all the movies, Santa never goes to the house directly next door. He always gets in his sleigh and flies off like 20 miles east.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Mini skirts are so cute and fun, like, oops, my ass is out.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Jeans have the tendency of looking neat when you’re about to wash them.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Can we start the weekend again? I wasn’t ready.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Jan 6, 2026

3,725

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Christmas adverts: “Eat all the food! Drink all the drink! Spoil yourself! It’s Christmas!” New year adverts: “Look at what you’ve done to yourself, you fat sack of shit!”

Going viral on Slack:

You can name literally any food or drink to the dentist and they’ll be like “ohhh, that’s actually so bad for your teeth. You should only eat water and toothpaste.”

Going bananas on Facebook:

Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

Just landed via Slack:

Handshakes should be banned. Touch our naked body parts together for all the world to see? Gross!

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I know it’s bad, and you’ve got to shut it down right away, but is there anything more hilarious than a swearing toddler?

Spotted on YouTube:

Kinda lame that pretending everything is fine isn’t working.

Just landed via Twitch:

My favorite pastime is looking for meaning where there is none.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I noticed you haven’t posted in a few weeks, and just wanted to thank you.

Just landed via TikTok:

Nothing I do for money is passion-based. It’s just pure hatred for being broke.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

Funny possibility quotes

Funny possibility quotes are the perfect way to sprinkle some humor 🌟 into your day while dreaming big 🚀. They remind us that anything can happen—even the wildest ideas! 😂 Whether you’re feeling optimistic or just need a good laugh 🤪, these witty sayings turn possibilities into pure fun. Ready to see the bright side with a chuckle? Let’s dive into the playful world of funny possibilities! 🎉✨

New funny possibility quotes 👇

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

0

2 months ago

am, anything, attitude, daily, daily routine, humor, motivation, possibility, procrastination, routine, time, today
January 1st: anything is possible. January 2nd: but not today.

0

2 months ago

anything, expectations, humor, January, motivation, new, new year, optimism, possibility, procrastination, reality, today, year
9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

0

2 months ago

afternoon, anything, humor, maybe, morning, motivation, optimism, possibility, procrastination, reality, time, tomorrow
I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

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2 months ago

forecast, humor, i, identify, identity, possibility, randomness, weather
The possibility of monsters residing underneath your bed is negated when the mattress is positioned on the floor.

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2 months ago

bed, childhood, fears, floor, humor, imagination, mattress, monster, monsters, possibility
Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!

0

2 months ago

age, career, career change, change, drug, drug kingpin, high, high school teacher, humor, i, inspiration, kingpin, old, possibility, remember, school, teacher, think, too, walter, Walter White, white
You can be anything when you grow up. For instance, I am very tired.

0

2 months ago

am, aspirations, choices, grow, grow up, humor, i, life, life choices, possibility, tired
True romantics have made peace with the possibility of lifelong solitude.

0

6 months ago

humor, irony, lifelong, peace, possibility, romantic, solitude, true

All funny possibility quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

60 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Don’t rub your happiness in people’s faces this Valentine’s Day. Let the couples enjoy themselves for once.

80 shares on TikTok this month:

Still hard to believe that access to infinite information made us dumber.

72 shares on Snapchat this month:

They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

82 shares on Pinterest this month:

Once your parents move from “What time are you coming back” to “Are you coming back today,” you have won the war.

65 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t know why “you made your bed now lie in it” is a bad thing. It sounds great! I’ll even lie in a bed I didn’t make.

76 shares on Twitch this month:

I hate when my kids ask me impossible questions like: What day is it?

15 shares on Threads this month:

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Come on, karma, do your job.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

We could have high-speed rail that connects the entire country, but instead we get AI porn bots that steal all of our drinking water to entertain the dumbest people alive.

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Phone so dry, I caught myself checking the weather.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood these days is just bills and running out of memory on devices.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The first time I heard “big naturals,” I thought it referred to major outdoor landmarks such as the Grand Canyon or the Great Barrier Reef.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You know how a dog tilts his head and looks confused when he hears a strange sound? Yeah, that’s how I feel when some people are talking.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors and windows, before any inspirational quotes get in.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,656

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Just spent a couple seconds concerned about the sounds my stomach was making before realizing it was a motorcycle outside.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Applying for jobs sometimes is wild, like how am I supposed to be passionate about a company I don’t even work for yet?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Carrots are a great thing to eat when you’re hungry, and want to stay that way.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

The absolute injustice of being asked to come and take away the boxes of junk that you’ve been storing at your parents’ house for 20 years.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Super excited about a brand new week of hanging on by a thread.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

I hate taking my pants off at the dentist. So humiliating.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

I wish someone would light up the way Siri does when I say, “Hey.”

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

I’m sorry for the things I said when I was running late due to circumstances completely within my control.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on TikTok:

Forget cheating, that’s young people’s shit. I’m ready to get married and have an affair.

Seen just now on Facebook:

If they’re called leggings, why is your stomach in there?

Just shared via Instagram:

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Just shared via TikTok:

My New Years resolutions are to do some things, and stop doing some other things.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: “Close Enough.”

Breaking via Discord:

I could put my keys in the same spot every day, but why deprive myself of a treasure hunt that makes me late.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

Just landed via LinkedIn:

When I’m on hold and the song ends, I always expect someone to pick up the phone.

Spotted on Threads:

Crazy how many organs in your body are dedicated to the poopification of dinner.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Every time you give someone the benefit, they deliver the doubt.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴