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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Let’s go out for carrots sometime.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

I’ve decided to become an organ donor. When I die, I want an elephant to get a new trunk.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I cannot definitively say, even after all I’ve seen, that I would not visit Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I had big plans to sleep in today, but my bladder canceled.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Another beautiful day, ruined by responsibility.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

I’ll see you in your nightmares.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Tidying up usually ends up with you sitting somewhere and playing around with things you found while tidying up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

772 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,934

Funny Quotes Topics

13,908

Funny Quotes Images

10,934

Updated

43 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

Just told my kids it’s illegal to have the light on while we’re driving. I will not break this cycle.

Shared recently on Slack:

I can’t wait for my mom to come to my new house so she can tell me how I organized the kitchen wrong.

Going viral on Slack:

My body is a “wonder what happened” land.

Seen just now on Telegram:

But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

Freshly posted on Slack:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

Spotted on Pinterest:

There’s just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“New password cannot be your old password” makes me so mad.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Don’t let anyone ruin your day. Be a man. Ruin it yourself.

Spotted on TikTok:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

Home » Funny Posts Quotes » Page 4

31 Funny posts quotes

For even more funny posts quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny posts quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Keep your friends close, but your smartphone closer.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

I like to push myself out of my comfort zone by sometimes sitting on the other end of my sofa.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

I always mean what I say, I don’t always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Sneaking up behind people and marrying them.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

If my son ever came out as gay, I’d be so furious. Furious that he never gave me fashion advice.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Yogurts should come in a five-pack, not a four-pack, or make the workweek four days.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

I don’t think I’d be so scared of spiders if they had eight tiny flip flops on.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Note to self: Very important! First hang up, then insult.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

You know when you have so much to do that you just sit down and do nothing?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example: Jill ate her friend’s sandwich VS Jill ate her friend’s colon.

Shared recently on Discord:

I grew up in a really small town. The closest thing we had to food delivery was someone egging your house.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Europeans read a lot because their television shows suck.

Spotted on Threads:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Breaking via Threads:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

Going viral on Telegram:

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

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Activity Log ✨

31 Funny posts quotes

More funny posts quotes 👇

For even more funny posts quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny posts quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.

I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.

Back in the day, you used to have to listen to records backwards to discover conspiracy theories.

Airports should have tattoo parlors for those of us with long layovers and poor impulse control.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I won’t be accepting any parcels for the neighbors in December this year. Last year it was all junk.

Some people feel like unpaid actors in my sitcom called “What Fresh Chaos Is This?”

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

Another day of explaining to mom that New York is big and the footage she saw wasn’t shot on my street.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Parenting just means you have to pretend you like to eat fruits and vegetables in front of your kids, knowing you’d rather eat a cheeseburger instead.

Gardeners are the only people who willingly go outside to get dirty, sweaty, bitten, and sunburned… and call it “relaxing”.

Things will be fine, eventually—in thousands of years—for rocks.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Me every time I wake up: Oh no, not again!

This meeting could have been a painting in a museum of boredom.

Making a grown man kiss his camera on Facetime.

Don’t worry, I’m only dead inside from the waist up.

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

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