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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

IKEA is the swedish word for “relationship meltdown in a public place.”

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Tried Adderall to help my productivity but now I’m just intensely aware of all the things I should be doing.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

The trick is to be born in the right place and at the right time. If you mess that up, it gets tedious.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

My sleep apnea was diagnosed at a staff meeting.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

My morning yoga routine has really helped shift my lower back pain into my upper back.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I can’t believe that it’s our turn to give money to our nephews and nieces.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Nobody says, ‘Bless you,’ when you fart.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2418 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,580

Funny Quotes Topics

15,251

Funny Quotes Images

12,580

34 minutes ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

I hope the coffee hits harder than reality does.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

A dating app for people who are way too into cookies, called Crumble.

Just shared via Twitch:

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

Just landed via Messenger:

If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Drugs do not ruin your career. Drug tests do.

Going viral on YouTube:

Told my homie I was “going through it” and he just said “go around it”.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Every time I spend my own money, I feel like somebody needs to reimburse me.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

You know you’re getting old when you get mad at some random car parked outside your house.

Going viral on TikTok:

I’m so sick of these little 30-minute weekends.

Home » Funny Sexy Quotes » Page 3

27 Funny sexy quotes

More funny sexy quotes 👇

Jan 25, 2025
Share →: If you find my upper lip mole sexy, wait till you see the dark spot on my MRI.

Commentary:
Oh, you thought that upper lip mole was all the charm I had to offer? Just you wait until you catch a glimpse of that intriguing dark spot on my MRI – now *that's* a conversation starter! 🧐🔍 #MysterySpot #MedicalMagnetism
Jan 25, 2025
Share →: I composed this post in a way that only the sexy can read it, so congratulations.

Commentary:
"Ah, well, well, aren't you just the smooth expert of linguistic seduction! 😏💋 Your words just sashayed right into our hearts…or should I say, 'eyes'! Congratulations on decoding this covert message meant only for the truly irresistible minds out there! 😉 #WordsmithOfSeduction"
Jan 24, 2025
Share →: I asked my doctor if I’m healthy enough for sex and he told me I’m not even sexy enough for health.

Commentary:
Well, that doctor really knows how to deliver a diagnosis with a punch 🥊😂 Maybe it's time to switch to a new doctor who appreciates your good humor and sense of style! 💁‍♂️💕
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: Seriously, how sexy was Freud’s mom?

Commentary:
"Freud's mom must have had those 'Oedipal' vibes going on 😏 Talk about the original 'Mommy Issues'! 🤣👩‍👦 #FreudianFantasies"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Maybe women decided to convince men that beards were sexy because they were sick of cleaning the washbasin after he shaved.

Commentary:
"Plot twist: Women created the beard trend so they wouldn't have to deal with beard trimmings in the washbasin anymore! 🧔🚫💦 #GeniusPlan #NoMoreCleanup"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

Commentary:
"Who needs vision when you have such a fabulous look? 😎 Say goodbye to 20/20 and hello to 100/100 in style! 👓 #BlindButFabulous"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

Commentary:
"Who needs good decisions when you have queso to spice things up? 🧀😂 Just remember, sometimes the cheesiest choices are the most satisfying! 😏🔥 #QuesoForTheWin"

For even more funny sexy quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny sexy quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2418 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,580

Funny Quotes Topics

15,251

Funny Quotes Images

12,580

34 minutes ago

3,443

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Money can’t buy happiness, until you’re on vacation and then you realize it definitely can.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Every time I blink, it’s Monday again. I can’t live like this.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

The single star on Texas’ flag is actually a review.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

I’m gonna build a pirate ship and sail the high seas. Who’s coming with?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Don’t be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It’s the best way to find out if the person you’re interviewing is a good candidate for the job.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

If you aren’t sleeping with me, then you’re sleeping against me.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Late replies don’t bother me. As long as we’re not in love, or you don’t owe me money, take your time.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Millennials aren’t having kids because no one’s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you have a favorite stove burner.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on TikTok:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Spreading quickly via X:

Anybody else not stopped farting this evening? Asking for a friend.

Spotted on Facebook:

Life is hard. It is harder if you are stupid.

Spotted on Twitch:

New email opener just dropped: “I am interested in bothering you!”

Shared recently on Messenger:

How many times does one have to open the fridge door before cake appears inside?

Seen just now on Discord:

Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Damn, girl, are you Black Friday? Because I’m wondering what your bloody deal is.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

The older I get, the more I don’t want to do things.

Seen just now on Reddit:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

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