Commentary:
"Who needs beauty sleep when you can have a full-on beauty hibernation? 💤🚮 #SleepingBeautyGoneWrong"
281 Funny still quotes
There’s nothing like the first two months with a man when he’s still pretending to be a good person.
Commentary:
Ah yes, the prologue of every romantic comedy where he's a "gentleman" and the floor is actually lava! 🤔😂🔥
My CV is so good, companies are still reading it for 9 months.
Commentary:
Guess my CV doubles as a bedtime story! 📜😴📚
No matter how busy I am, I still find time to waste on Twitter.
Commentary:
Even procrastination needs a cozy digital corner 🐦😂 #ProfessionalTimeWaster
“Are we still going?” … An introvert’s attempt to cancel.
Commentary:
Sounds like the extrovert's nightmare is now the introvert's dream come true! 🙈😂 #CancelCulture
So crazy to just be living every day through the slow-motion car crash of escalating fascism, and it’s still like, “Aww, man, I have to go to the dentist.”
Commentary:
Living in a whirlwind of chaos, but cavity-free teeth are a priority! 😬🦷🚗💥
Making friends as an adult is wild because there’s so much lore to catch up on. You’ll be 3 years in and still get random drops like, ‘Oh, by the way, I used to be married.’
Commentary:
Just when you think you've unlocked all the character backstory, they hit you with a surprise DLC! 🤯🎮🤣
I’m still tired from yesterday’s tired.
Commentary:
Running on yesterday's fumes, still waiting for my brain's coffee update ☕😴🔄
I’m at an age where I don’t have to go anywhere and I still have jet lag.
Commentary:
Who needs a plane ticket when you can just wake up tired? ✈️😴🌍
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your clothes are still in the washing machine.
Commentary:
Guess those clothes are taking a longer vacation in the washer than I did this year! 🧺⏳😅