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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Maybe we should put monkeys in charge for a while just to see how it goes.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

My brain logged me out due to inactivity, and I can’t remember the password.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

Please don’t take illegal substances. Or at least, don’t take MY illegal substances.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Lord of the Rings is wild cause Gandalf told Frodo he had to go on a super dangerous journey and Frodo was like “Ok, can I bring my gardener?”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

I drive home so quick after work like I’m late for the house.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Could a mosquito drink blood out of a cup or something or are they legally required to Capri Sun my legs all summer?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Spent 20 minutes training ChatGPT to write the perfect anniversary note for my wife, so don’t try to tell me I’m not romantic.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

50 minutes ago

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

Breaking via Snapchat:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic.

Going viral on X:

Deleting tweets like a writer who burns his manuscripts.

Shared recently on X:

Feels like the Chinese government turned up the power on the sleepy ray they use on me every morning.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Mayor of a small town is such a wild job. It’s like being the president of a country where you went to high school with the whole population.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I need to start hiding my money from myself.

Spotted on Threads:

I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

The fact that I have more clothes to sleep in than I do to go out in says a lot about who I am as a person.

Home » Funny Taxi Quotes

Funny taxi quotes

Funny taxi quotes are a great way to add some humor to your next ride! 🚖😄 From quirky driver anecdotes to amusing passenger observations, these quotes capture the lighter side of taxi adventures. Buckle up and enjoy the ride through these hilarious takes on urban transportation! 😂🚕

New funny taxi quotes 👇

19 hours ago
Share →: Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

Commentary:
That's a quick way to show him who's really in charge! 😂🚖👌
6 months ago
Share →: Hello taxi, off to Friday please. Money doesn’t matter!

Commentary:
🚖💸 "Hello taxi, off to Friday please. Money doesn't matter!" – Sounds like someone is ready to make it rain… with witty remarks and not cash! Keep chasing the weekend vibes without breaking the bank, my friend! 🎉💰 #FridayFeeling
6 months ago
Share →: I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old question of robot transportation! 🤖🚕 Looks like even robots need a lift sometimes – and who can blame them? It's rough out there in the concrete jungle! 🌆 Keep those robot taxis running, folks – it's all part of helping our mechanical friends navigate this crazy world! 🌍🚖"
6 months ago
Share →: I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.

Commentary:
"Ah, the glamorous life of a chauffeur to mini-humans and four-legged furballs! 🚖👶🐶 Who needs a limo when you've got a minivan full of chaos and cuteness? 🚗😂 #ParentingLife"

For even more funny taxi quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny taxi quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

50 minutes ago

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

The absolute injustice of being asked to come and take away the boxes of junk that you’ve been storing at your parents’ house for 20 years.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

You aren’t from the Midwest unless you can spin out in the snow, regain control and keep driving like nothing happened.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Egg nog was invented in Germany back in 1816 when Baron von Heldebrandt reportedly said “Hey guys, let’s get this custard drunk!”

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

The amount of inappropriate thoughts I have is a little concerning.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Never mind a Roomba, I need a robot garbage can that will follow my kids around the house all day.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Building a snowman so I can punch it in the face.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WhatsApp:

They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

Making waves on Threads:

I’ll call it a smartphone when I yell “Where’s my phone?” and it yells back “Down here in the couch cushions!”

Making waves on Twitch:

Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Stop telling everyone I’m posting from earth. People don’t need to know where I live.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

According to your ex, what’s exactly wrong with you?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time.

Making waves on X:

I’m on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Ohhh, I just realised you can change your facial expression. I was just doing the one.

Just shared via Threads:

Every time I see a dog with its head out a window, I know it’s having a better day than I am.

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