Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week.

Commentary:
"Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week. Because let's be real, a glass of wine or two magically transforms into just 'occasional sips' during a health check-up! 🍷😉 #HealthHacks #CheersToGoodHealth"
6 months ago
Share →: Let’s see how long my Monday slump lasts this time. Last week it was until Friday.

Commentary:
"Ah, the Monday slump – a force to be reckoned with! 🤔 Sounds like last week's slump had serious staying power… Maybe this week, Monday will realize it's overstayed its welcome and make a swift exit! 😂 Here's to battling the Monday blues with humor and a strong cup of coffee! ☕️💪"
6 months ago
Share →: Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

Commentary:
"Looks like they're really pushing for a 'movement' this week! 🏃‍♂️💩 Just remember, in the battle against diarrhea, it's all about endurance… and plenty of bathroom breaks! 🚽😆 #StayRegular"
6 months ago
Share →: If Monday were available for purchase at IKEA, it would be called “Fekking Hell”.

Commentary:
"If Monday were an IKEA product, it would come with 1000 pieces and no instructions, and the name 'Fekking Hell' would be just as hard to pronounce as it is to endure. 🪑🤪 #MondayBlues"
6 months ago
Share →: Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

Commentary:
"Watch out, folks! 🤓 New glasses incoming, so prepare for a serious downgrade in your attractiveness levels! 😂 Time to recalibrate those standards! 👓😉"
6 months ago
Share →: Instead of writing letters, let’s wait a week before texting each other back so it still feels like it.

Commentary:
"Ah, the ancient art of delayed communication! 📬🕰️ Who needs instant replies when you can savor the anticipation like a fine wine? 🍷 Let's bring back the thrill of waiting for a text response – it's like a digital game of hide and seek! 🙈📱 #PatienceIsAVirtue"
6 months ago
Share →: I’m sorry that I’m canceling plans. I made them last week when I assumed that, by now, I’d be a different person.

Commentary:
"Sorry, can't make it to our plans – apparently my transformation into a super organized, punctual being got lost in the mail 📬💁‍♀️ Maybe next week, when I'm a whole new me! 🤷‍♂️😆"
6 months ago
Share →: Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

Commentary:
"Horoscope: This week, the universe seems to think you're Dracula in disguise – don't be surprised if you find yourself involuntarily donating blood 🦇💉 #UnexpectedlyGenerous #VampireVibes"
6 months ago
Share →: Monday again. I just knew this would happen.

Commentary:
Looks like Monday showed up uninvited, like that one guest who always overstays their welcome 🙄 Don't worry, you've got this! Embrace the chaos with a big cup of coffee ☕ and a sprinkle of optimism ✨ #MondayBlues
6 months ago
Share →: How is it still this week?

Commentary:
"It feels like this week has been longer than a Monday meeting that just won't end! 🙄⏳ Time just loves to drag its feet when it's midweek, doesn't it? Hang in there, we'll make it to the weekend eventually! 🎉💪"