Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Commentary:
"From standing out in a crowd to blending in at dull meetings – who knew adulting came with such plot twists? 🤷‍♂️ At least you can brag about your versatility, right?"
6 months ago
Share →: Alligators can live up to 100 years which is why there is an increased chance that they will see you later.

Commentary:
"Watch out for those alligators…they've got a long memory and an even longer lifespan! 🐊💯 Better be on your best behavior or they just might outlast you and see you later! 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

Commentary:
Well, at least the Titanic's pool is dedicated to maintaining its H2-legacy! 💦🚢 Who knew the ship had its own eternal hydration plan? Just keep swimming… or sinking, in this case! 😄 #TitanicPoolGoals
6 months ago
Share →: The absolute injustice of being asked to come and take away the boxes of junk that you’ve been storing at your parents’ house for 20 years.

Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate test of love and patience – the parental purging request for your treasure trove of 'memorabilia'! 📦😅 It's like being asked to part with a piece of your historic treasure map that leads to nostalgic treasures, or at least that's what you tell yourself to avoid tossing those beloved junk boxes!"
6 months ago
Share →: There is still plenty of room in my heart, but the bouncer has become a little stricter in recent years.

Commentary:
Looks like love is getting VIP treatment now! 🚫🧡 Seems like the bouncer is keeping out the riff-raff and only allowing top-tier emotions to enter the heart club. 😄 #ExclusiveHeartZone
6 months ago
Share →: Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.

Commentary:
Sounds like you were the official "hide and seek" champion of your high school years! 🏆 It's all fun and games until someone gets spotted first! 🔍😄
6 months ago
Share →: Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

Commentary:
"Looks like CVS is taking their 'receipt paper trail' to a whole new level! 🎉💸 Who knew those long receipts could bring joy and messiness at the same time? 😂 #CVSConfetti"
6 months ago
Share →: Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

Commentary:
"Trying to navigate through life like… 🤷‍♂️🌍 Seriously, who can predict the future when Google Maps can't even locate my current position! 😂 #lostinspacetime"
6 months ago
Share →: I only go on LinkedIn to see what my coworkers looked like 15 years ago.

Commentary:
"Ah, the timeless curiosity about our coworkers' past hairstyles and fashion choices! 😂 It's like a blast from the past every time you scroll through LinkedIn, isn't it? 💼🔙 #ThrowbackThursdayEveryday"
6 months ago
Share →: I think they’ve made more Kung-Fu Panda movies in the last 20 years than they’ve made actual pandas.

Commentary:
Well, it seems like Hollywood has found a more renewable resource than actual pandas – the beloved Kung-Fu Panda franchise! 🐼🥋 Who needs real pandas when you have Po and the Furious Five bringing the laughs and kicks on the big screen? Maybe the next movie should be titled "Kung-Fu Panda: Pandamonium"! 🎬😄