Got electrocuted while fixing the doorbell, and now I can hear my girlfriend’s thoughts. She’s thinking she should have called an electrician.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

A bad relationship can ruin a good song.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

“Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Yeah, because I won’t be leaving my bed.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

If Monday were available for purchase at IKEA, it would be called “Fekking Hell”.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

If you wish me a happy Thanksgiving, don’t be surprised if I whip out a ziplock bag and ask you to bring me home some leftovers.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Those who still fit in their wedding dresses years later haven’t been making enough effort eating.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.