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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

AI won’t replace me because I’m already useless to society.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Apologies for the late response, instead of spending three minutes answering your email, I ignored it and felt anxious for two weeks.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Tech bros are frequently wrong but never in doubt.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Now that I’m in my mid-forties, I think I’ll take up parkour.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

778 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,940

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,940

17 minutes ago

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’ll never salute you, General Settings.

Trending via Snapchat:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Just landed via Reddit:

If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Studies show people who like my posts are happier, smarter, and better looking than those who don’t.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean that it ain’t gonna be a hell of a lot of fun.

Reported on YouTube:

Why would I go to my high school reunion? I didn’t want to be there the first time.

Broadcasted on X:

Spongebob wouldn’t even mess with some of y’all. But he’d hang out with me because my heart is pure, and I like to laugh a lot.

Reported on WeChat:

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

Signed an Executive Order that you have to give me a little forehead kiss.

5 months ago

Signed an Executive Order that you have to give me a little forehead kiss.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, well, well, looks like romance and bureaucracy are finally coming together! 💋 Who needs Cupid when you have an Executive Order for forehead kisses? 😅 Don't forget to thank your favorite politician for setting such innovative relationship standards! 📜 #ForeheadKissMandate

affection, executive, executive order, forehead, forehead kiss, give, humor, kiss, lighthearted, little, me, order, playful, relationship, signed

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

778 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,940

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,940

17 minutes ago

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

I accidentally messed up my life. How do I start a new account?

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

The inventor of archery: Man, I really wanna stab that guy over there.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Dating is just wondering why someone is single and then slowly figuring it out.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

I’ll marry the person who can go to a family event with me and still like me afterward.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

My plant is drunk, it’s growing in the wrong direction.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

You can’t spell dyslexia without sexy.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Giving people access to the internet was a massive mistake.

Freshly posted on X:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a jacuzzi.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I still make time for all my favorite hobbies, like drinking, swearing, and making people feel uncomfortable.

Just landed via Threads:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

Just landed via YouTube:

I’m an adult, but not the ‘makes positive life choices’ kind.

Going viral on X:

When people are telling me a story about their life it often reminds me of a much better story from my life.

Reported on Twitch:

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

Going viral on Discord:

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Shared recently on Slack:

One thing I miss about the pandemic is getting to rip my mask off like I just botched a surgery.

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