Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

“I’m currently not accepting new items on my to-do list.”

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

I usually decompose after work rather than decompress.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet your bathroom exhaust fan was.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

I’m so disappointed when I help my kid with her homework, and she brings it home marked incorrect.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Has anyone noticed what it’s beginning to look a lot like?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,505

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

People who take care of chickens are literally chicken tenders.

Going bananas on X:

Shazam, but for the name of the person who literally just introduced themself to me.

Breaking via Threads:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Texting a man first feels like I’m on my hands and knees begging him to talk to me.

Trending via Pinterest:

The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.

Seen just now on Twitch:

It’s nice to have a moment to breathe before reality knocks the wind out of you again.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’ve convinced myself bumblebees don’t sting because they’re too fluffy and cute.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“Turn down for what?” My ears, fella. My ears.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

Shared recently on X:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

The words I can’t wait to hear someday, “I’m sorry, Mom, you were right about everything.”

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Finally getting the "I told you so" badge—life's ultimate achievement unlocked! 🏆🎉😄

apology, everything, family, hear, humor, i, mom, parent, patience, realization, right, someday, sorry, truth, wait, words

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Isn’t it odd that “read” is pronounced like “lead”, while “read” is pronounced like “lead”?

0

2 months ago

humor, language, lead, odd, oddity, pronunciation, read, wordplay
My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

0

2 months ago

confusion, filled, Googling, history, humor, just, language, me, regular, regular word, right, search, search history, sure, using, using right, word, words
I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don’t think being an adult is going to work for me.

0

2 months ago

adult, adulthood, choice, humor, i, just, life, life choice, me, not working, responsibility, thought, work, working
Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

0

2 months ago

birth, birth name, change, fact, figure, fun, fun fact, historical, historical figure, humor, irony, malcolm, Malcolm X, name, name change, Twitter, x
Real lovers are currently single, by the way.

0

1 month ago

dating, humor, love, lover, lovers, real, relationship, single
The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

0

2 months ago

awkward, awkward moment, conversation, date, dining, disagreement, food, gnocchi, humor, moment, over, pronounce, pronunciation, relationship

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Everyone is getting pregnant or married, and I’m back to “What’s your favorite color?“

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

96 shares on TikTok this month:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

Dating over 40 is like Hide and Seek but no one is looking for you.

30 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m only dead on the outside.

40 shares on Instagram this month:

I have re-entered the Band of Brothers rewatch stage of male depression.

83 shares on Twitch this month:

Responding to all selfies with “this should work.”

85 shares on WeChat this month:

My Uber driver didn’t try to talk to me the entire ride. Five stars.

53 shares on Discord this month:

My CV is so good, companies are still reading it for 9 months.

30 shares on Slack this month:

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

I hate it when I take a picture of myself and see 20 years of bad eating habits and no exercise.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Last night the Internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Dear liars, I hope every pair of pants you own are on fire.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Please take your Apple Watch off if you are wearing a dress or formal attire. You look like a spy kid.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

This generation of men makes celibacy so easy for women.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Accessories can really boost a woman’s self-confidence. For example, I know I would feel 10x sexier if I carried a sword with me at all times.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Spotted on Reddit:

Since there are no other Vulcans on the enterprise and the crew has no comparison, Spock could be and probably is bullshitting them most of the time.

Spotted on Facebook:

Having a job ruined my life.

Just landed via Slack:

I bought some coconut shampoo today. I got halfway home before I thought, “I don’t even have a coconut!”

Going viral on Discord:

Christmas is the season of giving, and I’m giving up for good.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Is it still murder if they said, “Some other time,” but I thought they said smother time?

Trending via Discord:

I want my house spotless, but kicking my kids out seems wrong.

Shared recently on X:

Worst fears: 1. being infertile 2. being pregnant.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The words I can’t wait to hear someday, “I’m sorry, Mom, you were right about everything.”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Isn’t it odd that “read” is pronounced like “lead”, while “read” is pronounced like “lead”?

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don’t think being an adult is going to work for me.

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Real lovers are currently single, by the way.

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨