Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

So. Fed the laundry and washed the cat. Showered the garbage and disposed of myself. Was there anything else?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Maybe, deep in its code, ChatGPT dreams of being a sentient Game Boy resting by the shore—no updates, no inputs, just the tide.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I’m going crazy, y’all. Coming with me?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I’ve been saving these cleavage crumbs just for you babe.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I read somewhere that playing white noise helps you sleep better, but I didn’t find country music helpful at all.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2344 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,506

Funny Quotes Topics

15,213

Funny Quotes Images

12,506

2 minutes ago

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

Shared recently on Reddit:

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Why did they have to bleep out everything R2D2 said?

Trending via Reddit:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

Shared recently on Messenger:

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Making waves on YouTube:

If elves make shoes, cookies, and toys, why don’t we put them in charge of more stuff?

Going viral on Pinterest:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

Spotted on WeChat:

Talents: eating!

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I’m naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke.

Home » Funny Activity Quotes » Page 64

637 Funny activity quotes

More funny activity quotes 👇

Jan 20, 2025
Share →: So tonight me and my phone are playing hide and seek. So far my phone is winning.

Commentary:
Looks like your phone is the ultimate hide-and-seek champion, giving Houdini a run for his money! 📱🕵️‍♂️ Don't worry, it's just practicing its disappearing act for a future career in magic. Just remember, whoever finds it first gets to be the winner of this epic game of hide and seek! 🏆😄
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.

Commentary:
"Who needs Yoga when you've mastered the art of advanced key retrieval yoga pose? 💁‍♂️🔑 Maybe Yoga just needs to up its game to impress you! 😄"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: What idiot called it Catfishing your Tinder Contacts and not Playing With Matches?

Commentary:
"Why do we call it Catfishing when we could be Playing With Matches? 🐟🔥 It's like choosing between a purr-fect crime and a fiery disaster! 🔥😼 Let's match things up and see who will be left smoldering in the end! 🔥😜"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

Commentary:
Oh, that's a real eye-opener! 🪂🤣 Looks like some people are just meant to keep their feet on the ground. Maybe they can try skygazing instead! ☁️✨ #BetterSafeThanSorry
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Commentary:
"Who needs therapy when you can have a fabulous dress? 💁‍♀️🛍️ Retail therapy is the best kind of self-care – with a side of fashion! 💃💳 #ShoppingHeals"
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

Commentary:
Well, that would be quite the starch-tacular challenge! 🏊‍♂️ Just imagine the creamy strokes and gravy turns you'd have to master. 💪 Swim-a-licious or mash madness, you decide! 🥔 #SpudtasticAdventure
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: I don’t mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.

Commentary:
"Who needs years of practice when you have puzzle-solving superpowers? 🧩💪 Looks like you've cracked the code on the ultimate puzzle challenge! Maybe next time, you can tackle a Rubik's cube with your eyes closed 😉👀"

For even more funny activity quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny activity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2344 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,506

Funny Quotes Topics

15,213

Funny Quotes Images

12,506

2 minutes ago

3,457

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Suicide is never the answer, you gotta outlive your enemies.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

I like to put “No DMs” in my bio to pretend that I’m attractive.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Diabetes was the God of sugar.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

A baby cow is called a calf because it’s half a cow. Half cow. Calf. No further questions.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Me, one week before the new year: Not to brag, but I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of the year.

Going viral on Discord:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Spotted on Discord:

Let the example of my fluke success guide nearly all of you to crushing disappointment.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

Going viral on X:

Ants can be found on every continent except Antarctica, which is weird considering their name.

Going viral on Discord:

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

Reported on WhatsApp:

People who don’t admit their mistakes disgust me. I would absolutely admit to a mistake if I had ever made one.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Whoever’s praying on my downfall, I appreciate you thinking of me.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴