19 Funny court quotes — Wordgag ツ

It’s called shitposting, Your Honor. You should try it sometimes; it’s liberating.

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Notice how Lorde has a song called “Tennis Court” and not “Pickleball Court”? Tired of y’all pushing that fake sport.

1 month ago1 month ago

Forget a dinner date, let’s go sit in court listening to people’s cases.

2 months ago2 months ago

In my defense, Your Honor, I was left unsupervised.

4 months ago4 months ago

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Mar 17, 2025

I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

Mar 17, 2025Mar 17, 2025

In my defense, Your Honor, I grossly misunderstood the meaning of Boxing Day.

Feb 25, 2025

Your honor, when I said I wanted to be held, I didn’t mean in contempt.

Feb 1, 2025Feb 1, 2025

Your honor, my client would like to play on his phone for a little bit

Feb 1, 2025Feb 1, 2025

Doesn’t matter, Your Honor! I, for one, found it very funny.

Jan 28, 2025

Your honor, if it pleases the court, here’s Wonderwall.

Jan 28, 2025

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Jan 27, 2025

Your honor, my client wasn’t trying to stab the victim. He was checking to see if he was cake.

Jan 27, 2025

I’ll see you in court (at the marriage registry) (I love you)

Jan 27, 2025

Objection your honor, if the prosecutor doesn’t have anything nice to say then he shouldn’t say anything at all.

Jan 24, 2025

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Jan 22, 2025

He took my last fry, your honor.

Jan 22, 2025

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

Jan 22, 2025

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

Jan 20, 2025