694 Funny food quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Eating fast food shouldn’t count for calories because it’s not around long enough.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew fast food could be so sneaky? 🍔🍟 It's like saying 'out of sight, out of mind, out of waistline'! 😂 #CaloriesDisappearFasterThanDriveThruOrders"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.

  Commentary:
  "Because who doesn't love a little extra crunch in their diet for that added 'earthy' flavor? 🍄😂 Just remember, a little dirt won't hurt… hopefully! 😉 #DirtLoversUnite"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the eternal struggle of wanting to devour everything in sight but also magically lose weight! 🍔🤷‍♀️ Who needs logic when you can just skip straight to the end result, right? 🤣 #DietDilemmas

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs love handles when you've got snacks to hold on to? 🍔🍟 Looks like this is a case of sacrificing intimacy for instant noodles. 🍜🤷‍♂️ Embracing the foodie life, one bite at a time… even if it means struggling with zippers. 👖😂 #FoodieProblems"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Thanks to rice cakes, I still can’t imagine nothingness, but now I know what it tastes like.

  Commentary:
  "Rice cakes: the snack that makes you question existence 🤔 Who knew something with 'nothingness' in the description could be so crunchy and bland? 😂 #RiceCakeEpiphanies"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.

  Commentary:
  "Salad: the ultimate rejection pile turned healthy masterpiece! 🥗 Who knew that pushing food to the side could result in such leafy goodness? 😄 It's like art, but with veggies! 🎨 #SaladInnovation"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the endless world of pasta… Fliccaroni is clearly the rare gem of the pasta kingdom, only known to the pasta connoisseurs 😏🍝 Watch out, Google, you're in for a wild ride trying to decipher this culinary mystery! #PastaParadox"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

  Commentary:
  "Oh, the joy of restaurant appetizers! A brilliant invention for those of us with insatiable appetites and a profound lack of patience. 🍽️🤤 Can't we just have a never-ending stream of delicious nibbles? Keep 'em coming, please! 🍴😂"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Did I eat too much candy today? My stomach says yes, but my heart says no.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the eternal battle between the stomach and the heart – a classic dilemma! 🍬🤔 It seems the candies have indeed sparked a sweet rebellion inside you. Fear not, for sometimes a little indulgence is good for the soul… even if it leads to a sugar-induced negotiation between your organs! 😂🍭"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If someone else makes you a sandwich, it’s always better than if you do it yourself. It’s the same with sex.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the age-old dilemma: should you make your own sandwich or have someone else do it for you? 🥪 Turns out, the same applies to other areas of life too! 😏 Just remember to use fresh ingredients in both cases 😉🔥"

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