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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Googling “effect vs affect” in an incognito window.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Party rock is in the mouse tonighttt, piece of cheese I’m gonna take a big biteee.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Nutrition labels should include an “What if I ate the whole thing” section.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Texting my boss to let him know how excited I am for work tomorrow.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

They say dress for the job you want, but this baby diaper isn’t very comfortable.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

ChatGPT’s primary use is to generate plausible excuses to leave dinner at the in-laws’.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

The Bachelor is like “Meet Savannah from Brooklyn, Madison from Savannah, Brooklyn from Madison”

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Vote for me and I will halve the calories in chocolate.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Social media may have been a mistake.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2406 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,568

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,568

Updated

33 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I know sacrifice. I’m willing to pluck a few extra hairs to get to the white ones.

Reported on Facebook:

I’m the kind of introvert who dodges phone calls but sends paragraphs in texts.

Making waves on X:

What’s wrong, babe? You hardly touched your own advice you give to others.

Spotted on Threads:

What have I done to deserve this? Oh yeah, right, I remember.

Just landed via TikTok:

If two witches watched two watches, which witch would watch which watch? Each witch would watch which watch belonged to which witch’s wrist.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

Trending via Reddit:

We are all just prisoners here of our phone device.

Just landed via YouTube:

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

Making waves on YouTube:

Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.

Home » Funny Observation Quotes » Page 4

277 Funny observation quotes

More funny observation quotes 👇

4 weeks ago
Share →: The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Commentary:
"Feeling those rooster vibes more and more each morning! 🐔☀️ #WhyDidIGetOutOfBed"
4 weeks ago
Share →: People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

Commentary:
"Judging the judges like it's a sport! 👀🎯😂"
4 weeks ago
Share →: Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

Commentary:
"Absolutely! I bet they critique our flying skills too! 🐦👀😂"
4 weeks ago
Share →: Seeing a beautiful woman drink her beer is like witnessing an angel take flight.

Commentary:
"Who knew angels preferred hops over halos? 🍺😇✨"
4 weeks ago
Share →: I’ve been reading the room for 20 minutes. It’s not looking so good.

Commentary:
"Looks like the room is in desperate need of plot twists and a better script! 🎭🤔😂"
1 month ago
Share →: The concept of dominant hands is hilarious to me. That one of our hands is just like, “No, I’m not helping.”

Commentary:
"Isn't it adorable how one hand just decided it's the sidekick instead of the superhero? 😂✋🦸‍♂️"
1 month ago
Share →: Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Commentary:
"Out of this world and still going unnoticed? 🚀😆 Maybe it's time to phone home and get that hubby a telescope! 🔭👽"
1 month ago
Share →: I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

Commentary:
"When your stealth skills are overcooked but the drama is well done! 🍔😂 #Whoopsie"
1 month ago
Share →: Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Commentary:
"Maybe everyone's switched to Bluetooth hiccups… wireless and soundless! 🤫😂📡"
1 month ago
Share →: “I could see myself living here,” I said, in a different city for more than 24 hours.

Commentary:
"Just give me a day and I'll start picking out curtains! 😂🏠✈️"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

My dad must pay my monthly cell phone bill as atonement for his original sin of creating my consciousness.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

The purpose of life is to go insane sooner or later.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Any cults got something wild planned anytime soon? I’m trying to find the good estate sales.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

People be like, “I’m a work in progress” and never make any progress.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

I used to think the cat was dumb for staring out the window, waiting for birds, but I’d probably stare too, if occasionally a pizza flew by.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I always say “morning” instead of “good morning”, because if it was a good morning, I’d still be asleep.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Meds have done more for me than any man ever could.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

God saw you do that.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

277 Funny observation quotes

More funny observation quotes 👇

For even more funny observation quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny observation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

How quickly family vacations go from “Omg, we only have 4 days left” to “Omg, we still have 4 days left”

It turns out, as you get older, you don’t actually figure anything out; you just don’t have any energy to care anymore.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

You can have kids or you can always know where your scissors are. You can’t have both.

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

I don’t like how monkeys have taken ownership of the whole banana thing. I bet I like bananas almost as much as they do.

Friday the 13th used to mean something. Now every day is awful.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

If pills are too toxic to flush down the toilet, you probably shouldn’t swallow them.

Just found out my asexual friend was only using me for my companionship.

I deserve a treat when I have a bad week, but I also deserve a treat when I have a good week. I simply always deserve treats.

I’m not totally useless. I can be used as a bad example.

Terrifying if taken literally—if these walls could talk.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I’ve been in a bad mood since like 2010.

Just because the deodorant says 48 hours, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Combining breakfast and lunch: Brunch. Combining wine and dinner: Winner.

Not only is it not Friday, it’s not even Thursday.

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

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