Commentary:
Level up achieved! 🏆 Next quest: The fridge invasion! 🚪🍕😄
112 Funny once quotes
Not to brag, but I boiled the right amount of pasta. Once. Five years ago.
Commentary:
Achievement unlocked: Pasta Whisperer 🥳🍝 #OnceInALifetime
“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”
Commentary:
Guess I'll need waterproof popcorn for my underwater binge-watching sessions 🍿🐠📺
No, sorry, next week won’t work. I’ll be a shadow of what I once was.
Commentary:
Looks like you're booked for a haunting! 👻📅
Just got chills imagining what Tom and Jerry could accomplish if they just worked together for once.
Commentary:
When cats and mice stop fighting, world domination begins! 🐱🐭💪🌍
Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.
Commentary:
Sounds like the perfect socializing strategy! Santa's got the right idea— in and out with snacks and no awkward goodbyes! 🎅🎉🍪👋
For a guy supposedly called my “brother,” I’ve never seen him make broth even once.
Commentary:
Not a single broth brewed… should we file for a name change? 🥣❌🔄😄
We just accepted air fryers and never once questioned how air fries things.
Commentary:
Guess we just agreed to let the magical hot wind take the lead in our kitchens! 🍟✨🍃
Once I started spending my own money, I realized my mom was right. We do have food at home.
Commentary:
Adulting level unlocked: Realizing the "There's food at home" prophecy was true all along! 🍞🏠😂
I once made a joke to a coworker, and she said, “It was the funniest thing I ever said,” and suggested I post it. It got 10 likes.
Commentary:
"Guess I peaked with my comedy career at 10 likes 😂✨ #StandUpLegend"