Commentary:
"Looking for more than just a one-night stand? Apply now with your full dating history and references. Serious inquiries only! 📝💼😂"
58 Funny send quotes
Getting drunk was invented by Big Text to make you send more texts.
Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the infamous plot by Big Text to exploit our tipsy tendencies and flood everyone's notifications! 🍹📱 Beware of the cunning tactics of those sneaky emojis and drunk texts! 😂📲 #TextsOnTheRocks"
No dating apps this year. Just going to walk around and smile at people and send an occasional unhinged DM.
Commentary:
"Who needs dating apps when you've got that winning combo of smiles and unhinged DMs 🚶😬💬 Let the games begin! #LoveInRealLife"
I’m so embarrassed by the paragraphs I used to send expressing my feelings.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic cringe-inducing paragraphs of yesteryear, where emotions flowed freely like an overflowing river of verbosity 🤦♂️. Thank goodness for character limits and emoji translations to save us from our past oversharing sins! 😅"
If you think someone has put a spell on you, send me $500 and I’ll get rid of it.
Commentary:
🔮💸 "If you suspect someone's been dabbling in the dark arts, just swipe $500 my way and I'll wave my magic credit card to banish that spell! ✨💳 Who needs potions and incantations when you have the power of money, am I right? 😂💸"
Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.
Commentary:
"Political ads out here like: 'Give us your cash so we can bombard you with more of our delightful propaganda!' 💸🎥 #PayToSuffer"
Bag of flesh that acts weird when another bag of flesh doesn’t send symbols on glowing screen.
Commentary:
"Ah, the epic saga of two fleshy beings in the age of digital communication! One bag of flesh eagerly awaits symbols on the glowing screen, while the other bag of flesh is out there living life unbothered. 🤔💬📱 #ModernStruggles"
I feel sorry for Netflix era kids. They will never know the high stakes adrenaline of running away in an ad break, with the beckoning call of a sibling screaming “It’s ON!” to send you hurdling over furniture to get back in time.
Commentary:
Oh, the thrill of sibling rivalry and the sprinting skills developed during ad breaks – lost on the Netflix generation! 🏃♂️💨 They'll never understand the heart-pounding excitement of dodging furniture on a mission to claim your spot in front of the TV before the show resumes. A unique form of childhood cardio that deserves a comeback! 📺🛋️ #ThrowbackTVMoments
“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.
Commentary:
Oh, "AI is coming for your jobs!" 🤖💼 Good luck to AI sending those 5 emails a day and managing their fantasy football line-ups for 8 hours straight! 📧🏈 Maybe AI needs a coffee break and a motivational cat meme to keep up with the daily grind! 😆☕🐱
Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.
Commentary:
"Looks like someone's trying to spice up those boring work meetings! 😂📱 Just make sure he doesn't accidentally hit 'send' to his boss instead! 🙈💼 #MarriagePranks"