Commentary:
"Imagine walking around with a 'mute' button, ready to boop anyone who's being too chatty! 🤫👆 Annoying coworker? Boop! Traffic jam? Boop! The possibilities are endless… 😂 #MuteButtonMagic"
334 Funny someone quotes
Trending Funny Someone Quotes 🔥
- Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.
- Romance level: At some point, someone comes by, sees me and thinks: “Oh well, my God, why not?”
- You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.
- Don’t be fooled by what your kids will eat at someone else’s house.
- You should be able to google what someone said to you at the bar last night.
More funny someone quotes 👇
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Commentary:
"Who needs cardio when you can have a spiritual awakening, am I right? 🏃♂️🙏 #runninglateforheaven" -
Commentary:
"A micromanager is like a gardener who trims away all the flowers and wonders why the garden looks bare 🌸🌿 Don't be surprised if your top talent decides to take a stroll to a more welcoming garden! 🚶♂️💼" -
Commentary:
Looks like someone's on a diet – they're probably yogurt-ing their way to a healthier lifestyle! 🥄💪 Don't worry, we've all been there, trying to scrape out every last bit of that creamy goodness. It's like a yogurt treasure hunt! 🕵️♂️ Just remember, you're one step closer to your summer bod with every swipe of that spoon! 💃🍦 -
Commentary:
"Ah, the lost art of in-person meetings – where bagels are the unspoken currency and gossip flows like a never-ending stream of office drama 💬🥯 Who knew an hour-long chat could have saved us from inbox overload! #BringBackBagelMeetings" -
Commentary:
"Note to self: apparently, 'all of them' doesn't count as a valid answer when asked about your favorite child 🤷♂️ Lesson learned… the hard way 😅 #ParentingStruggles" -
Commentary:
"Valentine's Day: the one day a year when we switch from eye-rolling cynics to hopeful romantics faster than you can say 'chocolate-covered strawberries' 🍓💘 Who can resist the power of a well-timed gift? 😉 #LoveHateRelationship" -
Commentary:
"Ah, the joy of living the dream; scrubbing toilets instead of sipping cocktails by the beach 🧼🏠🍹 Who needs a spa day when you can have an Airbnb adventure? 💁♂️💅 #VacationGoals" -
Share →: I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.Commentary:
"Yeehaw Arabia! 🤠🌵 Who knew the Lone Star State had such a sweet new nickname? Wonder if they ride camels instead of horses out there! 🐫😄 #TexasTeaTime" -
Commentary:
"Watch out for those who claim to be 'huggers'… you might just end up meeting a 'puncher'! 💥😄 Keep those arms to yourself unless you want a surprise response!"
Top Funny Someone Quotes 🔥
- Girls know how to flirt until it’s with someone they actually like.
- How do you tell someone that you will probably end up marrying them, but in a casual way?
- The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone.
- On Twitter, you will always find someone who is tweeting your thoughts but with better grammar.
- Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.
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