Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

When people say they’re speechless, I always hope they mean it, but they never stop talking.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Why is everyone mean to the kindest people for absolutely no reason?

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

IKEA is like the Hotel California of furniture stores.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Haggis – the meal you have to stomach twice.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Please don’t invite me over if you have a leather chair that’s already peeling. I will peel it some more when you’re not looking.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

The female rage of having so much to say but refusing to say it, cause their emotional intelligence is too low for them to comprehend it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,632

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

I’ve been following this strict diet all week and so far all I’ve lost is my patience.

Just shared via Facebook:

“Who does she think she is?” Well, it appears she is someone living her life unconcerned with who you think she is.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

Live now on Reddit:

I get sad when I see how old people my age are.

Trending via Telegram:

I don’t want flying cars, I want the ability to start again from my last save point.

Just shared via Facebook:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Before you just FaceTime me randomly, please don’t.

Just landed via Snapchat:

My sister: snowboards. My brother: skateboards. Me: charcuterie boards.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

I get it, orcas. Sometimes you just need to ruin a yacht to feel something.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Yacht-wrecking therapy: when retail therapy just doesn't cut it! 🚤💥🤣

animal, animal behavior, behavior, destruction, emotion, feel, humor, i, just, life, marine, marine life, need, orca, ruin, sarcasm, something, sometimes, yacht

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m the Usain Bolt of running late.

0

2 months ago

bolt, humor, late, procrastination, running, speed, usain, Usain Bolt
If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

0

4 weeks ago

0.002K, anyone, awareness, exercise, fundraiser, humor, joke, laziness, me, motivation, raise, running, sponsor, wants, weekend
“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

0

2 months ago

dating, hallucinationship, humor, joke, love, relationship, single
Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

0

2 months ago

battery, dependency, devices, humor, leave, loneliness, me, own, self-reliance, technology
My sleeping pattern ain’t even a pattern anymore, it’s a freestyle that’s on shuffle.

1

2 months ago

even, freestyle, humor, pattern, shuffle, sleep, sleeping
I embarrass myself in front of myself.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, embarrassment, funny moment, humor, i, joke, moment, personal, self, self-deprecation

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

75 shares on WeChat this month:

I want a pet eagle that’s trained to steal people’s sandwiches for me.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

63 shares on Telegram this month:

Every time you rub your eyes, they should change color a little.

51 shares on Threads this month:

Parenting just means you have to pretend you like to eat fruits and vegetables in front of your kids, knowing you’d rather eat a cheeseburger instead.

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

Andrew Tate is what you’d get if Axe body spray gained consciousness.

35 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m sorry I didn’t text you back. I’m really busy watching the The Lord of The Rings in the form of mini clips on TikTok.

76 shares on Discord this month:

Reverse cowgirl is not a fair trade because, why do you get a view of my sexy back, and all I’m seeing are your toes throwing gang signs?

14 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

34 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You look like something I drew with my left hand.

14 shares on Discord this month:

Lifting my wife’s wedding veil and finding out she’s Darth Maul.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I’ve been in a bad mood since like 2010.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Hawk o the mornin tuah

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Wow, pretty rude for people to exist who are younger and hotter than me, but OK.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

They should invent a type of sleeping where you wake up feeling rested.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Maybe the problem is that I’m cooler than any man I’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I’ve used dark mode so much that I’m physically repulsed by white screens now.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

At my age I don’t sleep, I nap between pee breaks.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on TikTok:

People who scream sneeze need their own island.

Trending via Reddit:

Most people have 32 teeth. Some have 10. Simple meth.

Going viral on Messenger:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

Just landed via YouTube:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

Breaking via Pinterest:

My anxiety is chronic, but my overthinking is iconic.

Shared recently on Reddit:

My plan is to die young as late as possible.

Broadcasted on Discord:

No, sorry, next week won’t work. I’ll be a shadow of what I once was.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

It’s a beautiful day to ignore your existing problems and create new ones.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

What’s really missing is a day between Saturday and Sunday.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I get it, orcas. Sometimes you just need to ruin a yacht to feel something.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’m the Usain Bolt of running late.

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

My sleeping pattern ain’t even a pattern anymore, it’s a freestyle that’s on shuffle.

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨