Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

One of the worst ways to waste your youth is by being insecure.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Some of us better hope Santa doesn’t check social media, because if he does, all we’re getting for Christmas is therapy.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

It’s quite ironic that “strap on,” backwards, spells “no parts.”

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

My boss told me to show initiative, so I decided to finish work early.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,615

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I’m at the age where I have to warm up first before jumping to conclusions.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

Going viral on Reddit:

I forgot to sweep up some crumbs earlier, and I just heard an ant moaning in pleasure as he discovered the bounty.

Breaking via X:

Responding to any and all emails with ‘wow ok’

Just landed via X:

Time to get off the internet, I’ve already had enough stupid for the week.

Just shared via Messenger:

I’m addicted to following the rules I made up. And also breaking the rules I made up.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Your pronouns should be get/help.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

My bed has a stronger influence on me than my ambitions.

Spotted on Instagram:

If my neighbors keep fighting like this, I might need to cancel some of my streaming services.

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
😂🏋️‍♂️ "I hear being a swamp witch is trending at the gym this season! Just rocking that 'fresh out of the cauldron' look!" 🧙‍♀️💦

angry, attitude, disgusting, every, exercise, fitness, fitness struggle, funny attitude, gym, gym life, humor, i, idea, life, meet, mood, people, self-deprecating, struggle, swamp, time, turn, witch, workout, workout mood

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The zero likes won’t stop me from posting. I will talk to myself if I have to.

0

2 months ago

confidence, humor, i, independence, likes, me, media, motivation, myself, online, online posting, persistence, posting, self-expression, social, social media, stop, talk, zero
My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

0

2 months ago

animation, appreciation, cartoons, childhood, classical, classical music, humor, i, jerry, kid, music, music appreciation, pizza, real, sadism, tom, Tom & Jerry, watching
Have you fallen in love with me yet, or do I need to post more nonsense?

0

2 months ago

comedy, dating, flirt, humor, i, love, me, need, nonsense, playful, post, sarcasm
In 2007, if you wore a long-sleeve T-shirt under a regular T-shirt, it meant that you liked music.

0

2 days ago

2007, clothing, fashion, liked, long-sleeve, long-sleeve T-shirt, meant, music, regular, style, t-shirt, trend, under
My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

0

2 months ago

body, body lotion, comedy, favorite, health, humor, joke, lotion, medicine, medicine joke, pain, pain relief, relief, Voltaren
Caveman: I just invented the wheel. Journalist: Here’s why the wheel is bad for humanity.

0

2 months ago

bad, caveman, critique, humanity, humor, i, invention, journalist, just, progress, satire, wheel

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on Reddit this month:

I showered with my boyfriend. My breasts have never been so clean! Wow!

76 shares on Telegram this month:

Going out with 38% battery and no boyfriend.

11 shares on Instagram this month:

USPS tracking: Step 1: We don’t think it exists. Step 2: Delivered.

57 shares on Threads this month:

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through.

62 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s not fair when attractive people are also good at things.

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

36 shares on Telegram this month:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

91 shares on TikTok this month:

A freshly cleaned bathroom triggers an irresistible urge in men to trim their beard.

67 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you keep the house dark, not only do you save on electricity, but it also looks cleaner.

97 shares on TikTok this month:

The cool thing about being a procrastinator is, really bad ideas also don’t ever make it off the ground.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

I deserve a treat when I have a bad week, but I also deserve a treat when I have a good week. I simply always deserve treats.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

I can usually cope with the opinions of others because I don’t listen.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

I need an app that deletes my number from other people’s phones.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

I’m so old I remember when a hashtag was called a pound sign, and we played tic-tac-toe on top of it.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Just because you can connect to your neighbor’s bluetooth speaker and play ghost noises doesn’t mean you should.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Hansel and Gretel weren’t wrong, every bad decision I’ve ever made started with being hungry.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Tequila won’t fix your life, but it’s worth a shot.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

You spend so long trying to think of a name for your cat only to end up calling them “for god’s sake” and “please stop”.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Instagram:

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

Seen just now on Twitch:

A dating app to meet other people with low IQ called OK Stupid.

Breaking via Twitch:

You should tell different people completely different things about yourself so that they then get into arguments when gossiping about you.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My bed wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I had to stay home to take care of it.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

Trending via TikTok:

Scrolling the feed as a mature person, not judging anybody.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The key to happiness: 1/ order a pizza. 2/ eat that pizza. 3/ repeat!

Shared recently on Telegram:

They are mad because you took that knife out of your back and used it to cut ties.

Spotted on X:

They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.

Just landed via Telegram:

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The zero likes won’t stop me from posting. I will talk to myself if I have to.

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

Have you fallen in love with me yet, or do I need to post more nonsense?

In 2007, if you wore a long-sleeve T-shirt under a regular T-shirt, it meant that you liked music.

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Caveman: I just invented the wheel. Journalist: Here’s why the wheel is bad for humanity.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨