Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

That awesome moment when you open the fridge and the first thing you see is the thing you wanted to eat.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

People never run off to join the circus anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Yoga is just slow motion breakdancing.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Work from home ain’t for everyone. I, for one, hate when my coworkers try to message when I’m shopping.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Might lay here until someone draws my chalk outline.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

If you ghosted me, don’t come back. Maintain that energy, babe. Stay dead.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

4,024

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Seen just now on Discord:

Sometimes I’ll call in, disguise my voice, and insist on speaking to me, or I’ll take my business elsewhere.

Making waves on Slack:

What I’ve learned in all these years of marriage is how to open a bottle of beer silently.

Live now on Reddit:

The worst part about working from home is that your real husband is also your work husband.

Just landed via Twitch:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Trending via Threads:

Might lay here until someone draws my chalk outline.

Going bananas on TikTok:

“I can’t possibly lose this if I put it here” I say to myself before completely forgetting where here is.

Going viral on Threads:

My ducks are not even remotely in a row. My ducks are in places no duck has ever gone before.

Trending via Messenger:

If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

Breaking via Twitch:

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"When your bilingual skills impress the cat into speaking English, but he's still one step ahead! 🐱🗣️😂 #FluentInFeline"

animal, animal communication, back, barrier, cat, cats, communication, effort, English, humor, i, joke, just, language, language barrier, language joke, making, meowing, quirky, show, tried

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

0

2 months ago

guacamole, humor, hyperbole, language, pronunciation, wordplay
Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

0

2 months ago

couple, crime, grammar, humor, i, just, liquor, liquor store, me, robbery, store, wife
You don’t scare me. You’re not those two minutes when I can’t find my wallet.

0

2 months ago

fear, humor, i, me, minutes, panic, scare, two minutes, wallet
What happened to the huge corporate Christmas parties you see in all the ’90s movies? Seems like that doesn’t exist at all anymore.

0

1 week ago

90s, 90s movie, Christmas, Christmas party, corporate, corporate party, culture, exist, holiday, holiday party, huge, movie, nostalgia, office, office culture, party, seems
Happy new fear!

0

2 months ago

celebration, fear, happy, humor, new, new year, year
When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

0

2 months ago

back, confusion, directions, giving, humor, i, irony, just, lost, love, me, miscommunication, miss, navigation, someone, tell, travel, wrong

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I decided not to go for a run today because of the weather, but mostly because of the running.

26 shares on TikTok this month:

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

84 shares on Instagram this month:

Stupid cow blocking the road. HOW DAIRY!

10 shares on TikTok this month:

I use karate strictly as a last resort, after I’ve exhausted fleeing and screaming.

33 shares on Instagram this month:

Cashews are my favorite because they’re salty and hunched over just like me.

99 shares on Facebook this month:

I just feel like we shouldn’t have a new year until we get this one right.

67 shares on Snapchat this month:

You look like you can go as yourself for Halloween.

10 shares on Facebook this month:

Stop hating yourself for everything. Be specific.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

I never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

The Bible is 100% accurate when thrown at close range.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

People on Facebook be like “can anyone tell me about a thing I can easily Google myself?”

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

AI won’t replace me because I’m already useless to society.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Being single only sucks when you’re a little drunk and really want to flirt.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Not today, Satan, but next week works.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

The worst part about being an adult is that no matter how sad you get, the show must go on.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

When you look this sexy, they should let you leave work early.

Trending via Telegram:

Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.

Just landed via WeChat:

Accidentally said “normal” when they asked what milk I wanted at the leftist cafe.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

Just shared via Threads:

Three wise men? I highly doubt that.

Going viral on TikTok:

Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad.

Going viral on Discord:

It’s weird how the UFO’s always seem to crash in places that only the government and military have access to.

Seen just now on Discord:

Nothing ruins your weekend faster than remembering Monday is lurking in the shadows.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Bro to bro: Never get your haircut on the day of a special event.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I love when someone is like “I’m funny because I have trauma and it’s a coping mechanism” and it’s like “Okay, not to add to your trauma, but you’re not funny!”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

You don’t scare me. You’re not those two minutes when I can’t find my wallet.

What happened to the huge corporate Christmas parties you see in all the ’90s movies? Seems like that doesn’t exist at all anymore.

Happy new fear!

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨