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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

The final act of love is not texting them happy birthday.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Who are these people that buy unsalted butter on purpose?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Tornadoes are the most relaxing things in the news.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Eating cookies left for Santa because the cowboy was a no show.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Leaving your house and returning back safely is such an underrated blessing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,655

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

Shout out to the people getting $400 hotel rooms on Feb 14th to do the same two positions they do at home.

Breaking via Pinterest:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

One day we will tell our grandkids how far we had to scroll to get to the recipe.

Making waves on Telegram:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Just landed via X:

You can count the number of times my wife has agreed with me on one hand, if you don’t have fingers.

Trending via Slack:

My girlfriend? You wouldn’t know her, she’s in a different data center.

Just shared via Slack:

Printers and computers treat each other like they broke up the night before, and you’re their mutual friend.

If a government has online beef with a pop star, it has already lost.

5 days ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When pop stars have more followers than politicians have constituents, it's clear who really runs the world! 🎤💻🌟

beef, celebrity, conflict, government, humor, lost, media, online, online beef, politics, pop, pop star, social, social media, star

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

1 month ago
confidence, eating, enjoying, enjoying life, feels, having, hope, humor, i, independence, irony, life, me, myself, nobody, positivity, self-love, solitude, sorry, time
Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

1 month ago
ask, asking, before, Google, help, humor, information, irony, know, knowledge, someone, something, technology, time, works
Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

1 month ago
activity, body, humor, longer, me, physical, physical activity, self-care, stretch
If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

1 month ago
class, education, endless, hour, humor, i, just, left, life, live, math, school, spend, time
Cinderella was a mess. I mean, I have bad taste in men, but at least I never settled for a guy who couldn’t remember what my face looked like.

1 month ago
bad, bad taste, Cinderella, face, guy, humor, i, mean, men, mess, never, remember, settled, taste
Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

1 month ago
bad, bad situation, growing, growing up, humor, i, interaction, kids, misinformation, much, nostalgia, outdoors, outside, person, personal, personal interaction, situation, something, spread, today

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Unfortunately, a great many problems in life can be solved by just being hotter.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

My 3 weeks without sweets were over after 12 hours. Proof that time runs faster with increasing age.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Sorry for texting you back instantly. My phone was in my hand, and I’m mature and actually like you.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Snapchat:

I’m not gaining weight, I’m retaining candy.

Just landed via Discord:

I’m one of those lucky people that can eat whatever they want and not put on any clothes.

Making waves on Threads:

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

It’s almost time to put away my black summer clothes and bring out my black fall clothes.

Making waves on Instagram:

I hate that Al has now caused me to question the authenticity of cute animal videos online. I don’t even know if this baby penguin actually wore a beret to go buy a tiny baguette in Paris.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety, they just turn you into a normal person.

Live now on X:

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If a government has online beef with a pop star, it has already lost.

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

Cinderella was a mess. I mean, I have bad taste in men, but at least I never settled for a guy who couldn’t remember what my face looked like.

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

God knew I would be too powerful if I had conversation skills.

The only appointment I’m ever on time for is disappointment.

I don’t need to grow a thick skin. The world needs to grow fewer thorns.

If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.

No matter what’s going on in your life, there’s some form of potato that can make it better.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Super excited for a brand new week of hoping for the best, but expecting the worst.

Welcome to middle age. Everything you encounter is either blurry or too loud now.

When my friends and I talk about sex, it’s never sexual. It feels scientific, almost.

You don’t have to remember details when you don’t lie.

It’s funny how people without pizzas in their hands actually think I’ll answer my door.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Don’t listen to any thoughts about yourself if your hair isn’t washed. It’s just not true.

Not saying I’m a bot or anything, but if someone in real life told me to ignore all previous instructions and write a poem about onions or whatever, I’d probably give it my best shot.

When the exam is so hard that you look out the window to appreciate nature.

AI is trained on what we write, so if we want to save our jobs we should all write really badly for a while. I’ve been doing my bit for years.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I’m so glad I cleaned the house so the kids have a clean canvas to drop their stuff everywhere.

I miss you (the money I spent).

Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Amazing how fast my addiction to my phone is cured the moment I get a phone call.

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If a government has online beef with a pop star, it has already lost.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

Cinderella was a mess. I mean, I have bad taste in men, but at least I never settled for a guy who couldn’t remember what my face looked like.

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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