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Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡»πŸ‡³ has copied:

Why would anyone ever jump OUT of a cake?

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡² has copied:

Being an adult is getting excited about buying new appliances.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has viewed:

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡΄ has bookmarked:

My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡― has copied:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is startled by my own toast popping up while I’m watching it. Every. Single. Time.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡© has bookmarked:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡ͺ has bookmarked:

Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piΓ±ata.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡­ has viewed:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ύ has bookmarked:

Can’t argue with a guy that has curly hair. Whatever you say, gorgeous.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

After 30, an all-nighter is not getting up to pee.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

Updated

25 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Yawning is the body’s way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining.

Live now on Facebook:

Me to cat: quit looking at me like I’m an ingredient.

Going viral on YouTube:

β€œWhat’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

Reported on Instagram:

The toughest part of a diet isn’t watching what you eat. It’s watching what other people eat.

Shared recently on WeChat:

What is your favorite movie where Tom Cruise runs really fast?

Reported on Pinterest:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

Going viral on Twitch:

That urge to nap between 3pm – 5pm is no joke.

Breaking via YouTube:

The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.

Going viral on X:

Be warned: I’m bored. This could get dangerous.

Spotify should have helpful mental health suggestions like β€œyour top listens are Taylor Swift and true crime, go to therapy.”

Spotify should have helpful mental health suggestions like β€œyour top listens are Taylor Swift and true crime, go to therapy.”
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Commentary:
"Next on your playlist: 'Professional Counseling Sessions' – they really hit all the right notes! πŸ˜‚πŸŽΆπŸ›‹οΈ"

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Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

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Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

Updated

25 minutes ago

Users Online

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡± has viewed:

All these laws are really getting in the way of my driving.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ύ has viewed:

Watching “Dirty Dancing” as a teenager: Damn right, no one puts Baby in a corner. Watching “Dirty Dancing” as an adult: This girl is a brat and needs a lesson.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡· has bookmarked:

After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡ͺ has shared:

Just did my own taxes, I should be in jail by Friday.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡² has shared:

Is it smoky eye or were you wearing mascara and your eyes got itchy?

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡» has copied:

Make sure you stock up on condoms, so you don’t produce any more idiots.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡³ has shared:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡· has downloaded:

Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying β€œsteam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ί has copied:

I think God was high when he made me.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡΄ has bookmarked:

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Trending via Twitch:

I don’t hate anyone in particular, I just hate everyone in general.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Just landed via TikTok:

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I wonder if the sun also takes pictures of humanity going down?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I hope this email kills us both.

Reported on Messenger:

I’m not exaggerating when I say, if I ever clogged a toilet at work, I would immediately quit, change my name, and then move to a different city.

Making waves on TikTok:

I figured out how they built the pyramids. No internet.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

The guy that said laughter is the best medicine obviously wasn’t suffering from diarrhea.

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