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Ludacris once said “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home” and I haven’t left the house since.

3 months ago

I hope your day is as nice as my ass.

3 months ago

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

3 months ago

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

3 months ago

I love wearing sunglasses. Am I looking at your face? Am I looking at your ass? No one knows.

3 months ago