Funny quotes context

39 Funny context quotes

When they say screen time is bad for you, they just mean the ones at work, right?

4 days ago

I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

2 weeks ago

“I’m just playing devil’s advocate here.” Ok, why are you helping the devil?

1 month ago

Watching as gravity slowly unfriends you.

1 month ago

To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

2 months ago

Before ball parks were invented there was pretty much no way to give someone a rough estimate.

3 months ago

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

3 months ago

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

3 months ago

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

3 months ago

Sorry, I wasn’t really listening but that’s awesome, unless it isn’t of course.

3 months ago

I didn’t mean to mimic your voice, I just had to know what it felt like to sound like that.

3 months ago

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

3 months ago

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

3 months ago

As an outsider, what’s your view on intelligence?

3 months ago

If I ever die on some hill, rest assured, something fishy is going on.

3 months ago

When I say “I hate drama”, I mean I hate being involved in drama. Other people’s drama? Big fan!

3 months ago

How did we decide to go with cockpit?

3 months ago

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

3 months ago

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

3 months ago

You should never forget where you came from. That’s probably where your keys are.

3 months ago