Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Nudes are outdated. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Laugh all you want. My Encyclopedia Britannica set will never require WiFi.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Maybe your baby is crying because he knows you don’t have rizz.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Fall in love? I can barely fall asleep.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

I hate when I accidentally blow all of my leaves into my neighbor’s yard.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Unless it’s manic, I don’t want to hear about your Monday.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Dating someone from Twitter is like believing a stripper loves you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

4,007

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

My toxic trait is that I expect people to have common sense, and I get mad when they don’t.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is: don’t do that!

Broadcasted on Slack:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Spotted on Slack:

My tattoo means that I can’t be trusted with $200.

Just landed via Threads:

Yesterday, thieves broke into my home. They searched everywhere and found nothing. They beat me up, telling me to work harder.

Just shared via Discord:

There is no physical evidence to say that today is Tuesday, we all just have to trust that someone kept count since the first one ever.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I named my wifi “The Promised LAN” because it always connects, but occasionally leaves you wandering in the desert looking for a better signal.

Making waves on TikTok:

Sawing a hole in a table from underneath to steal a cake is a lot harder than cartoons would have you believe.

Seen just now on X:

Geometry is a scam. What do you mean “prove it’s a triangle”? Just look at it.

Trending via Reddit:

Writing ‘thanks.’ instead of ‘thanks!’ so you know I’m mad.

Home » Funny Dating Quotes » Page 8

491 Funny dating quotes

More funny dating quotes 👇

If a man says “I don’t deserve you,” believe him. Because he is about to show you why.

0

1 month ago

believe, dating, deserve, honesty, humor, i, man, relationship, show, trust, warning, why
It’s so hot to me when a man has a poorly run Instagram account.

0

1 month ago

account, attraction, dating, hot, humor, Instagram, man, me, media, poorly, run, social, social media
Since I stopped texting first, I haven’t heard from a lot of people in a while.

0

1 month ago

communication, dating, friendship, humor, i, life, lot, media, message, people, relationship, social, social life, social media, stopped, texting, while
Today I went for a walk with a girl, she noticed me, so we went for a run.

0

1 month ago

dating, exercise, fitness, girl, humor, i, interaction, me, noticed, run, today, walk
Nudes are played out. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

0

1 month ago

communication, dating, dumb, humor, i, intelligence, know, loud, me, nude, nudes, played, reading, send, video
Guys will say, “I know a spot,” and then take you on a downward spiral.

0

1 month ago

dating, downward, downward spiral, expectations, guy, guys, humor, i, know, relationship, say, spiral, spot, take, trust
I’ve tasted long-term relationships, I’ve tasted casual dating. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 9 p.m. ..!

0

1 month ago

9, advice, before, career, casual, casual dating, dating, going, humor, i, life, life advice, long-term, long-term relationship, recommend, relationship, relationships, sleep
Currently accepting DMs from any man with a sturdy bunker on his property.

0

1 month ago

apocalypse, bunker, dating, DM, DMs, humor, man, property, quarantine, shelter, survival
They should invent crushes that like you back.

0

1 month ago

back, cru, crush, dating, humor, invent, invention, love, relationship, should, unrequited, unrequited love
Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

0

1 month ago

change, dating, girlfriend, money, perspective, relationship, relationships, whole

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Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Dating someone from Twitter is like choosing your spouse from a mental hospital.

16 shares on Threads this month:

There should be a true crime story about feeding someone a peanut butter sandwich and giving them nothing to drink.

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

This Monday could have been an email.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

Is it smoky eye or were you wearing mascara and your eyes got itchy?

86 shares on TikTok this month:

US etiquette question: Do you need to tip the guy at the border who reads your last five years of social media history?

24 shares on Instagram this month:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI take a 30-minute poop right after clocking in.

67 shares on X this month:

Only time I believe a man is when he tells me that I’m pretty.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

82 shares on Threads this month:

My door camera alerts are all just me stepping outside to see how warm it is.

46 shares on Twitch this month:

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I don’t procrastinate, I delegate to my future self.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: I watched Rebel Moon 2 and the Netflix app worked well. Showed me the entire movie. In color.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

On my way to HR again for nicknaming my coworker “Mastercard” because they take credit for other people’s work.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

America is like that TV show that’s been on for too long, and the writers don’t know what to do, so they just make anything happen.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Anything can be a dating app if you aren’t a coward.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

This gingerbread house isn’t even close to fire safety codes.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

If Liverpool play Real Madrid right now, both teams will lose the game.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

According to my kids’ Christmas lists, they think this parenting gig pays pretty well.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

The part right before bench pressing when you’re laying down but not lifting is so good.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Going viral on Instagram:

I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Yesterday I really wanted tacos and now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

Seen just now on Threads:

I let my cat smell every wine I drink so she can get a job as a sommelier and help pay my rent.

Breaking via Facebook:

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

Shared recently on Reddit:

My super talent is hitting every red light on the way to wherever the hell I’m going.

Trending via Messenger:

One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.

Spotted on X:

In an effort to demonstrate how pointless internet debates are, please prove to me that snow is real.

Activity Log ✨

491 Funny dating quotes

More funny dating quotes 👇

All funny dating quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨