Commentary:
"Absolutely! I've got a PhD in Friendology and a minor in Awkwardness! 😂🎓👥 #NewKidOnTheBlock"
168 Funny friendship quotes
I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.
Commentary:
"Designated drivers beware: some folks are too talented at being backseat comedians! 😂🚗🍷"
I’m the friend who shows up with a shovel and an alibi.
Commentary:
"Ready to dig up some fun and plant the seeds of innocence! 🕵️♂️🔍😂"
Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.
Commentary:
"Exactly! Sugar's the real MVP when your 'lettuce' down! 🧁🥳😂"
The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.
Commentary:
"Finally, a math equation I can get behind: fewer friends = more cake! 🎂🍰😋 #CakeEconomics"
Unfollowing girls on Instagram as soon as they get a boyfriend is something I’ll never stop doing.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'Now You See Me, Now You Don't' technique! 😂👻 #UnfollowRoutine"
I changed my Facebook name to “Benefits.” Now, when people add me, it says, “You are now friends with benefits.”
Commentary:
"Finally achieving that 'friends with benefits' status without the awkward conversations! 😂👏 #LifeHack"
Girl talk is my favorite. You go from discussing goals to talking about shoes, to hating men, to planning a trip in six minutes.
Commentary:
"Sounds like the meeting agenda I'd actually show up for! 🤣🥿✈️ #MultitaskingMasters"
Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?
👇
Commentary:
"When they finally have a brunch together, the universe might implode from the awkward silence. 🌈🥐😅"
You think you’ve seen gold diggers, until you see a male friend group where only one of them made it.
Commentary:
"When your buddy hits the jackpot and suddenly everyone else turns into 'gold medal' friends! 🥇🏆🤣 #OlympicLevelDigging"