82 Funny guy quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like Mr. Drill Bit has some personal issues to work through too! 🔨🛋️ Maybe he's trying to vent out his frustrations on those poor IKEA pieces. Let's hope he finds some stability outside of flat-pack furniture assembly! 😅"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Cinderella was a mess. I mean, I have bad taste in men, but at least I never settled for a guy who couldn’t remember what my face looked like.

  Commentary:
  Oh, Cinderella, sweetie, your standards were lower than her glass slipper size! 🙈 Talk about a prince who needs to get his memory checked! Maybe next time, Cinderella should swipe left on the forgetful ones! 👸🏼🤦🏻‍♂️

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Imagine being hungry and some guy tries to teach you to fish.

  Commentary:
  "Imagine being hangry and some dude busts out a fishing tutorial 🎣😂 Talk about adding insult to hunger! Like, dude, can you just hand over the sushi already? 🍣 #HangryProblems"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a knight in shining armor when you have the pizza delivery guy on speed dial? 🍕🚀 #PizzaIsBae"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “yeah, but not to you”.

  Commentary:
  Oh, perfect comeback strategy! Turn the tables and leave them speechless! 🤭👀 Just imagine their faces when you hit back with that line – priceless! 😂💥 Keep 'em on their toes with some sassy sass! 😏👏 #SassyAndClassy

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Thinking of becoming the “where’s my hug” guy in prison.

  Commentary:
  "Seems like this person is aspiring to be the reigning king of 'Where's my hug?' requests – in the least ideal location possible! 🙅‍♂️🤣 Maybe it's time to reconsider their life choices before diving into the world of prison etiquette! 🔒😅"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Pretty sure the guy in front of me at McDonald’s ordered the rest of the food.

  Commentary:
  Looks like someone's going for the "I'll have one of everything" approach at McDonald's! 🍔🍟🌭 Must be preparing for the ultimate fast food feast! Better hope they saved some fries for the rest of us! 🤣🍔🍟

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Guy inventing jogging: how can I suffer, but with music?

  Commentary:
  A guy inventing jogging was probably like "Hmm, how can I make this self-inflicted torture more bearable? Ah, I know! Let's add some tunes and pretend we're not dying 😂🏃🎶"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Somewhere there’s a girl ignoring 15 guys for a guy who gives her no attention.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic tale of unrequited love… or maybe just a case of selective blindness? 🤷‍♂️ Here we have a true mystery: what magic spell did this guy cast to make her choose no attention over 15 others?! 🔮😂"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

  Commentary:
  "Opera: where drama meets denial at its finest 🗡️🎶 Who needs blood when you have a high note to hit, right? 😂"

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