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Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡ͺ has shared:

I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

Santa punched a hole in my wall because I left him soy milk.

Someone from πŸ‡«πŸ‡· has copied:

My life is ruined. I wish to live no more. Never mind, I found the remote.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡· has copied:

By day I am just a regular loser, by night I am the same loser only it’s nighttime.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

If my TV’s so smart then why doesn’t it slap me when I turn on the news?

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡· has downloaded:

The good news: once you get a PhD, friends and family will refer to you as doctor. The bad news: They will only do it when you’re wrong.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡­ has downloaded:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¬ has shared:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡² has bookmarked:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡· has downloaded:

For whom the doom scrolls!

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

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1791 added this month

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11,953

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14,758

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11,953

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Social Media Log πŸ’«

Freshly posted on Discord:

It’s important to listen to both sides of the debate because you need to hear both the reality of the situation and also the dumbest thing anyone’s ever said.

Just landed via Slack:

It feels like it costs $100 a day just to exist anymore.

Shared recently on WeChat:

It’s crazy that we’re closer to the year 3000 then I am to finding love.

Live now on Snapchat:

Spotify Wrapped isn’t enough, I want an Excel spreadsheet of my listening habits.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Just shared via YouTube:

I bought some old lady reading glasses as a lark, a laugh, and now my eyes don’t hurt. This isn’t what I wanted.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

At the age where a big break could mean either my career or a hip.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Texas Chain Saw Massacre is full of plot holes. What happens to the victims when they die? Is there an afterlife?

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Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ώ has shared:

Getting a nose ring, so I don’t lose my keys.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡² has viewed:

My son loves Monty Python. My work here is done.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Έ has viewed:

My retirement plan is time travel to the 80s.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ή has copied:

I don’t have a yoga mat, but I have a Twister mat, and it’s the same thing.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¬ has copied:

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Ή has viewed:

I believe it was Aristotle who once said β€œThe fastest way to get your kids to stop screaming is to also start screaming.”

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¬ has viewed:

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡³ has bookmarked:

If she says β€œso just what exactly is THAT supposed to mean”, you’re gonna have a bad time.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has copied:

Friday the 13th used to mean something. Now every day is awful.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Trending via Telegram:

β€œThis too shall pass!” Okay, but like, when exactly?

Going viral on Threads:

One man’s worst nightmare (me) is another man’s peace (also me).

Just shared via Twitch:

Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Been there, done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn.

Just landed via Messenger:

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

Going viral on Slack:

Imagine you blocked me, and I crawled out from under your couch to ask why.

Making waves on Slack:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Seen just now on Telegram:

They say dress for the job you want, so I walk around dressed like Darth Vader.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I would prefer not to.

Spotted on X:

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

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