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Social Media Stars โญ

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

The first step is admitting that the other person is the one with the problem.

43 shares on X this month:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

65 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Legend says that when you’re overwhelmed and on the edge of a nervous breakdown, a small child will appear and tell you that you made their sandwich wrong.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and canโ€™t remember the password to any of them.

86 shares on Discord this month:

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

15 shares on Facebook this month:

Hotel elevators are hell for those of us who are small-talk failures. The guy asked me, โ€œYou just get in today too?โ€ and I said, โ€œWell, no,โ€ then stood in silence.

41 shares on Twitch this month:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

56 shares on Slack this month:

Just did several sets of some bullshit at the gymโ€ฆ no idea which muscles have been targeted.

55 shares on Telegram this month:

If youโ€™re reading this, drink some water. Youโ€™re not a cactus.

21 shares on Discord this month:

Nothing worse than when I turn up to Park Run to find it is indeed going ahead.

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