Funny shell quotes

• Wife bought something on FB Marketplace, but she’s afraid she’ll get kidnapped, so she sends me to pick it up from a guy whose wife sent him because she’s afraid to get kidnapped.

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  2 months ago

  afraid, Facebook, Facebook Marketplace, fear, funny situation, guy, husband, kidnap, kidnapped, marketplace, me, online, online purchase, pick, pickup, purchase, sent, shell, situation, something, wife, wife fear

• I always bring luggage when visiting my mom because I know she’ll send me on a guilt trip.

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  2 months ago

  always, bring, family, guilt, humor, i, joke, know, luggage, me, mom, parenting, relationships, sarcasm, send, shell, travel, trip, visiting

• Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.

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  2 months ago

  back, bro, casual, communication, humor, just, patience, playful, puzzle, reassurance, relationship, right, shell, working, worry

• If a woman says she’ll be ready in 15 minutes, she will be. No need to remind her every half hour.

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  2 months ago

  every, expectation, half, hour, humor, minutes, need, ready, relationship, remind, reminder, shell, time, woman

• Walking on egg shells? In this economy?

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  2 months ago

  economy, egg, egg shell, humor, sarcasm, shell, stress, uncertainty, walking

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