Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

Autumn and winter are coming. The time when I make myself tea and always forget that I’ve made myself tea.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

This is your sign to cancel all work meetings today.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

No, I didn’t eat enough protein today, but I did think of you with enough intensity to generate new muscle tissue in my heart.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Okay, that’s enough todaying for today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,248

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via LinkedIn:

I received a DM telling me that I’ve offended some of you. I’m truly sorry; I meant to offend all of you.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Look at you with tape over your camera, while Amazon, Facebook, and Google have your whole life on file.

Just shared via Messenger:

Sorry, I ghosted you. I liked you too much.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Umbrellas are great if you only want to get wet sideways.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I don’t want flying cars, I want the ability to start again from my last save point.

Just landed via TikTok:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Just took a nap in jeans. No one will ever understand the darkness that lurks inside me.

Shared recently on Threads:

Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

Just landed via Reddit:

I’m going to hell if anybody needs anything.

Funny spill quotes

Funny spill quotes bring a splash of laughter to those messy moments when drinks fly and snacks scatter everywhere! 🍹😂 Whether it’s a coffee catastrophe or a snack attack, these witty lines turn spills into smiles. Embrace the chaos and find humor in life’s little slip-ups—because sometimes, a good laugh is the best way to clean up the mess! 🧼😄 Spill the fun and brighten your day, one giggle at a time! 🎉✨

New funny spill quotes 👇

All funny spill quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I don’t assume anything except the fetal position.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m so embarrassed by the paragraphs I used to send expressing my feelings.

18 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

25 shares on Twitch this month:

A recent study showed that people who are reading this text thought they were learning something useful.

55 shares on YouTube this month:

Don’t ask me for work advice, I’m just going to tell you to quit your job.

79 shares on Twitch this month:

Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon.

38 shares on Snapchat this month:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

If she reads Bukowski, she’s not looking for love. She’s looking for someone who will ruin her creatively.

73 shares on X this month:

Don’t worry. You’re exactly where you should be in life. Because you’ve made horrible choices.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Once I see a vein on your forehead while we arguing, I’ll let you be.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I have now learned the moonwalk. It’s visually the coolest way to get fresh dog poop off the soles of your shoes.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope your day is as nice as my ass.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever woken up, kissed the person sleeping next to you and felt glad to be alive? I just did, so I won’t be catching this train again.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Ummmm, no, I don’t watch ‘Instagram Reels.’ I have TikTok. I like to get my brain damage directly from the original source.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Who needs dystopian fiction when you can watch the news?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,508

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Addicted to bad posture. Omggg, why is it so comfortable to give yourself scoliosis?

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I’ve watched porn with better writing than Stranger Things.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

I’m sick of getting woken up at 6am by the bin men. I just want a nice sleep but they always insist that I get out of the bin before they collect it.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Ex’s be like “I gave you everything”. Yeah, trust issues.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

In your 20s, there will be an evil narcissist demon disguised as the man of your dreams. It’s important that you run from that loser before he steals your light.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

There’s a disconnect between the decibel level of my car singing and my talent.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

You don’t have to write every day to be a writer! You just have to feel guilty every day that you don’t.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

My biggest motivation for getting out of bed in the morning is knowing that I’ll eventually be able to get back in it.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via X:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Spotted on Twitch:

Life update: it’s getting worse.

Going viral on Discord:

Hobbies include fake smiling while waiting for people to stop talking.

Freshly posted on Discord:

If you see me out running, you should run too, because something is definitely chasing me.

Making waves on Twitch:

There is no bigger lie than “fun for the whole family”.

Spotted on Instagram:

The weather forecast should include the percentage of answers blowing in the wind.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I don’t think people are actually getting any dumber. I think stupid people have just become way more confident.

Live now on Slack:

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Picking up a hitchhiker is not worth the risk of being forced to make small talk with a stranger.

Making waves on Reddit:

I am an influencer. If you aren’t influenced in any way, that is on you. Do better.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴