40 Funny straight quotes

• My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

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  2 months ago

  adjustment, boyfriend, hotel, Hotel Mama, humor, living, living together, mama, me, moved, parent, relationship, responsibility, single, single parent, straight, together

• Patience is for beginners. I’d rather freak out straight away!

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  2 months ago

  away, beginners, freak, freak out, humor, ID, patience, reaction, spontaneity, straight, stress

• Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

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  2 months ago

  banana, candy, company, eye, food, honesty, humor, know, lie, perception, straight, taste

• If you’ve been talking for 5 minutes straight, it might be someone else’s turn.

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  2 months ago

  communication, conversation, humor, listening, minutes, skills, social, social skills, someone, straight, talking, turn

• The people that ask Grok everything are the same people that follow Google Map directions straight into a lake.

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  4 months ago

  ask, direction, directions, error, everything, follow, Google, Google Map, grok, humor, lake, map, mistake, navigation, people, same, straight, technology, user, user error

• The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

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  4 months ago

  color, fact, food, humor, me, naming, observation, onion, purple, purple onion, red, red onion, someone, straight

• Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

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  4 months ago

  bit, gender, gender role, guy, humor, just, little, male, metrosexual, performative, performative male, rebrand, role, say, sexuality, slang, stereotype, straight, straight guy

• If you’re thinking of becoming a parent, just imagine working 6,570 days straight without a day off.

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  5 months ago

  day, day off, days, humor, imagine, just, parent, parenting, responsibility, straight, thinking, work, working

• You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

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  5 months ago

  ever, funny observation, game, gaming, guys, hallucination, hours, humor, long play, observation, play, sound, sounds, start, straight, video, video game

• Had to sit with a straight face while my landlord told me I was paying his rent and mortgage for him.

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  5 months ago

  face, i, landlord, me, mortgage, paying, rent, sit, straight, straight face, tenant, told, while

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