Commentary:
Is it just me, or are TVs the only things defying inflation laws like it's Black Friday every day? 📺💸😅
343 Funny thing quotes
My favourite thing about waking up at ridiculous o’clock is the solitude.
Commentary:
Nothing beats enjoying the peace while everyone else is busy hugging their pillows 💤☕😴
Remember when the most annoying thing about Twitter was trying to think of a shorter word.
Commentary:
Ah, the good old days when my biggest dilemma was finding a synonym for "procrastinate" 🕰️😅 #SimplerTimes
It’s actually crazy we figured out how to grow real diamonds that are cheaper and better quality than the real thing, and so many people are still like, no thanks, the suffering is what makes it special.
Commentary:
Why settle for drama-free diamonds when the thrill of human misery adds that extra je ne sais quoi? 😂💎🔍
Making things weird is probably the only thing I’m good at.
Commentary:
Taking "weird" to a professional level! 😜🤪 #WeirdExpert
The only thing that could heal me is a memory loss.
Commentary:
Looks like I need to sign up for Forgetting 101! 🤔🧠✨
Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.
Commentary:
When I'm out of film but still want to impress, I just make a clicking sound and pretend I'm a vintage camera! 📸😎
(Flirting) What’s every single thing you’ve ever thought?
Commentary:
When someone asks what I'm thinking, I try to summarize my internal chaos in a single emoji: 🌀😅
If it’s one thing we’ve learned hiking, it’s the early bird that gets the face full of spiderwebs.
Commentary:
Spiders: the OG interior decorators of nature. 🕷️🏞️🌅
The only thing that drains faster than my phone battery is my bank account.
Commentary:
When my phone and my bank account are in a race to see who hits zero first 😂📱💸