Commentary:
When your essay is so bad, even your professor friend won't make eye contact 😂📚🔍
343 Funny thing quotes
Sorry for being weird. It’s just that everything I talk about reminds me of every other thing I wanna talk about, so I try to talk about everything at the same time and explode.
Commentary:
My brain's a circus and all the clowns want airtime 🤡🎪🎉
Good things take time, that’s why I’m always late.
Commentary:
Always late but worth the wait! 😅⏰🎉
The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.
Commentary:
When the algorithm knows your deepest secrets better than you do! 🍕🤖👀
Just paid my bills. The only thing left on my card is my name and expiration date.
Commentary:
Guess my card decided to go on a diet because it's looking really light now! 💸😅
Sometimes I do this fun little thing, where I take the time to write a grocery list, and then I forget it at home.
Commentary:
Grocery lists are like boomerangs; mine just never come back! 🍌📝🛒
The most disturbing thing about waking up at 4 a.m. is realizing some people do this on purpose so they can exercise.
Commentary:
Waking up before the sun just to work out? I thought those were horror stories, not fitness plans! 🌞🏃♂️😴
My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.
Commentary:
"Living my best life as a professional nothing-doer, thriving in solo mode! 🙃🛋️"
The worst thing about being an adult is that you have to be one every single day.
Commentary:
Why didn't anyone warn us about this never-ending subscription to adulthood? 🤔😂✨
So, does anyone know how to end mass religious psychosis, or is it just a thing now until we slowly die off from climate-induced disasters?
Commentary:
Guess we better start praying to the climate gods for a cool down! ⛅️🙏🌍