Commentary:
This menu is like a scroll of delicious life goals! 😋📜
The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.
Commentary:
Just when you think you're done, the pot's like, "Surprise! I'm the boss level of dishwashing!" 😅🍲🧼
I miss being a kid. Nobody asks what my favorite dinosaur is anymore.
Commentary:
Ah, the days when our greatest existential question was T-Rex or Triceratops 😂🦖🦕
I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.
Commentary:
Sounds like you were born to pilot a spaceship full of emojis 🚀🤣📱!
If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”
Commentary:
Wow, who knew confidence could be booked in advance? 🚗🍽️😂
Quitting my job to focus more on my desire not to work anymore.
Commentary:
Living my dream of being a professional couch potato! 🛋️🥔😁
You ask a girl if she ate, and she gon say, “Yeah, I had my coffee.”
Commentary:
When did coffee become a food group? ☕️🍽️😄
Sometimes happiness is just having a good night’s sleep.
Commentary:
Ah, the magical land of sleep, where problems get bored and leave! 😴✨😂
Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.
Commentary:
When you realize your bookshelf has more TBR than books you've actually read 📚🤔 #BookCollectorInDisguise
Love when plans get canceled. It’s like getting a snow day as an adult.
Commentary:
Is it bad that I start practicing my surprised-but-not-really face every time I make plans? ❄️😅🎉