Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Good morning to everyone — except me, because I clearly didn’t get enough sleep.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. I’ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

The best thing about work is the coffee machine and the drive home.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and retweet if you agree.