Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

When life closes a door, just open it again. It’s a door, that’s how they work.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Body: time to fall asleep. Brain: hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Nothing brings neighbors together like a few cops cars in front of another neighbor’s house that no one likes.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

What I’ve learned in all these years of marriage is how to open a bottle of beer silently.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

All the wrong decisions in this country are based on the fact that my balcony faces out the back and so I can’t speak to the people.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,457

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

Going viral on Threads:

Welcome to your 40s: here’s ten pounds.

Just landed via WeChat:

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

Shared recently on X:

If I were a bird, you’d be the first person I’d shit on.

Spotted on Slack:

Just because you are unique, doesn’t mean you are useful.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

Just landed via Snapchat:

I hate when you leave your phone on the side, and it brings up that red evil clock.

Spotted on TikTok:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Seen just now on Discord:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera!

Freshly posted on X:

Petition to bring back payphones in public places. I don’t want to give my kid a phone, I want to give him a quarter.

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Maybe they're trying to figure out if you're the one who ate their snacks in a past life. 👀🍪🤔"

baby, curiosity, humor, innocence, know, observation, somewhere, stare, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

0

2 months ago

chores, daily, daily routine, exercise, fitness, humor, laundry, motivation, results, routine, working, workout
Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

0

2 months ago

apology, appointment, appointments, call, calls, depression, embarrassing, embarrassment, fog, health, lift, mental, mental health, miss, phone, phone call, return, sometimes, tour, whole
The lion can’t keep living like this.

0

2 months ago

animal, humor, keep, lion, living, motivation
Ever since I was a kid, I always knew I wanted to live in a galaxy far, far away.

0

2 weeks ago

always, away, childhood, dream, ever, far, far away, galaxy, humor, i, kid, live, sci-fi, space, wanted, wish
Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

0

3 months ago

algorithm, complaint, customer, customer service, developer, humor, i, manager, service, speak, want
Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.

0

2 months ago

consumerism, happiness, humor, irony, know, money, shopping

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Slack this month:

In a relationship with my bedroom fan.

23 shares on WeChat this month:

I have officially reached the age where I am bothered by lights being on, doors left open, loud noises, and people.

32 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m at that age where someone can call me the wrong name and I’m just like “whatever, I’ll be Dan for a minute”.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

WFH is so great until you realize you’ve walked about 17 steps all day.

35 shares on YouTube this month:

I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

15 shares on Pinterest this month:

This meeting could have been a cake.

77 shares on Reddit this month:

Nobody has ever been given a cheeseburger and been upset about it.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

Therapy? I have Spotify.

66 shares on Facebook this month:

Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

80 shares on Discord this month:

Kids are like pancakes. The first one is always a bit strange.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Another beautiful day, ruined by responsibility.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

I really want to be nice, but annoying people just won’t let me.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

The only hot singles in my area are in my wallet.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back with snacks, it was always meant to be.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

When God created the giraffe, he probably slipped with the mouse on the screen. This is how its neck was created.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Hey man, your fly is down. Let me get that for you.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

When you ask for your phone charger back and your teenager has the audacity to ask “what percentage are you on?”

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

Hey, we’re calling off the search party. We found a different guy out there we like more.

Breaking via TikTok:

Imagine you blocked me, and I crawled out from under your couch to ask why.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Met my soulmate again today: mashed potatoes and gravy.

Breaking via Facebook:

I accidentally clicked on an ad, so I guess I will see that product all over my phone until I’m dead.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I saw God in a dream and all he did was brag about making Pedro Pascal.

Just landed via Messenger:

Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from reading your book.

Seen just now on Discord:

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

Going viral on Instagram:

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

Going viral on WeChat:

I’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up, and subtitles come out my face.

Freshly posted on X:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re exercising.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

The lion can’t keep living like this.

Ever since I was a kid, I always knew I wanted to live in a galaxy far, far away.

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨