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When you can't decide if you need to clean up for guests or leave everything as evidence! 😅🪑🔪
Author Archives: slickboy
Not to brag, but I boiled the right amount of pasta. Once. Five years ago.
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Achievement unlocked: Pasta Whisperer 🥳🍝 #OnceInALifetime
A girl hating you is a million times better than her calling you a ‘nice guy’.
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When she calls you a "nice guy," just remember: you're only one fedora away from becoming a meme 🤠😂
I have a very active anti-social life.
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Living my best introverted life! 🛋️😎📚
I be telling people, “I respect your decision,” and I really don’t. The decision is always something stupid, and I just don’t want to engage any further.
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I feel you, sometimes the best reaction is a smile and a nod… followed by a facepalm 🙄🤦♂️
I lied, there’s no sex. Can you tell me a bedtime story?
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Who needs bedtime action when you can have bedtime fiction? 🛌📖😴
If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.
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That sounds like a gruelling test of endurance—don't forget to carbo-load with some donuts 🍩🏃♂️😴!
Took a break from Twitter for my mental health, so I’d figure I’d come back to ruin it again.
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Back from a social media cleanse and ready to spice up the chaos 🌪️😜✨
Think that’s enough todaying for today.
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When you reach peak 'todaying' and your couch starts calling your name 😅🛋️🔔
Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.
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Overthinking is like the never-ending buffet of thoughts — all you can think, forever! 🤔🍝🥲