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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Parenting just means you have to pretend you like to eat fruits and vegetables in front of your kids, knowing you’d rather eat a cheeseburger instead.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

You should get a pension for having to go to school for so many years.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Relationship status: you’d think something called a Roomba would be a better dancer.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

I’ve decided to become an organ donor. When I die, I want an elephant to get a new trunk.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Sailors wish they could swear like me.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Mercury is no longer in retrograde, so never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Soft launching your call out the next day by telling everyone at work your stomach feels a little weird.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

It’s so cold outside I saw a gangster pull his pants up and walk stiffly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1886 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,048

Funny Quotes Topics

14,835

Funny Quotes Images

12,048

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Police officer: please step out of your vehicle. Me: after this song, hold on.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Welcome to your 40’s: See that kid dressed up like a cop? He is a cop.

Spotted on Telegram:

I had no idea being an adult would involve so many lotions.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

Trending via Discord:

Kind of rude you didn’t wake me up before you went went.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Just shared via Threads:

Caught the bouquet at the funeral.

Making waves on Messenger:

I always take responsibility for my actions when there is no one else around to blame.

Just landed via Facebook:

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

Home » Funny A.m. Quotes

Funny a.m. quotes

Funny a.m. quotes are the perfect way to kickstart your day with a smile 😄☀️ Whether you’re not a morning person or just love a good laugh before coffee ☕️, these witty one-liners will brighten even the groggiest wake-up moments 😂🌞 Get ready to embrace those early hours with humor and a dash of sass!

New funny a.m. quotes 👇

For even more funny a.m. quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny a.m. quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1886 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,048

Funny Quotes Topics

14,835

Funny Quotes Images

12,048

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Of course babies cry when flying, their entire understanding of planes centers around them being eaten.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

It infuriates me that computer Scrabble doesn’t get mad when I win even though I’m livid when it wins.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

With me, it isn’t Netflix & chill. It’s Prime & panic.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

IKEA is the swedish word for “relationship meltdown in a public place.”

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

In an effort to demonstrate how pointless internet debates are, please prove to me that snow is real.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Talents: eating!

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

It’s that time of year where every jacket you choose is wrong.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

Apple, who gives you permission to turn the brightness down again when I’ve just turned it up?

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I tried counting sheep so I can fall asleep but that got boring, so I started talking to the shepherd instead.

Reported on Pinterest:

Today is one of those days where I have to remind myself that you’re not allowed to strangle people.

Spotted on Facebook:

It’s wild that you can just do anything. Date the wrong person, choose the wrong career. You can go outside and start eating dirt if you want, and the universe lets you. Not even a pop-up like “Are you sure?“

Spotted on YouTube:

Flirting is easy until you have to flirt with the person you like.

Just shared via WeChat:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Spotted on Instagram:

Italy stands for I Truly Always Love You.

Trending via Facebook:

Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Thursday.

Just shared via Instagram:

So proud of my ancestors for crawling out of the sea and evolving lungs. Pretty disappointed in them ever since though.

Just landed via Facebook:

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Just landed via Messenger:

That second wave of sleep after waking up too early.

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