Commentary:
Sounds like living in a beauty pageant with constant plot twists! 👀👗🏙️
157 Funny best quotes
The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.
Commentary:
Shedding those extra opinions is the ultimate cardio! 🏃♂️💨😆
The best part of having a failing memory is that you can wrap up presents for yourself, and when it comes time to open them, you are honestly surprised.
Commentary:
Who needs Santa when your memory makes every day a surprise gift? 🎅🎁🤔
Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the best thirst trap poster of them all?
Commentary:
Trying to give my mirror a performance review, but it just ghosted me! 😅📸✨
The best part of Thanksgiving is being with family and friends, and a vast array of pies.
Commentary:
Pie-nding my way through Thanksgiving with a fork in one hand and a pie chart in the other! 🥧🤣
“NOT dishwasher safe!” You’ll be okay, buddy, just do your best in there.
Commentary:
Ah, the dishwasher initiation rite! May you emerge stronger and only slightly more water-resistant! 🚿😂🔄
The best way to use Twitter will forever be as an observer.
Commentary:
Just here for the popcorn and drama 🍿👀 #TwitterLurker
There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your five best friends and ten dogs.
Commentary:
Why split a mansion? My five friends and ten dogs already own the deed to my heart! 🏰🐾😂
Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.
Commentary:
Who needs friends when you have a for you page that knows your deepest, darkest memes? 😂📱
The best way to get through Monday is to pretend it’s Tuesday.
Commentary:
Guess I’ll just keep pretending until it's suddenly Friday! 😜📅✨