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New funny quotes: 56 this month

15,809 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: Mar 13, 2026

 

 

 

 

Funny childbirth quotes

Funny childbirth quotes bring a lighthearted twist to one of life’s most intense moments 🤰😂 From sleepless nights to diaper disasters, these witty lines capture the chaos and joy of welcoming a tiny human 👶🎉 Perfect for new parents needing a good laugh or anyone who appreciates the humor in baby bumps and midnight cries! Get ready to giggle through the madness with these gems 💬✨

If you’re out shopping this week, be nice to the retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited to shop until Mary’s water broke.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

Sitting in a room with my husband and kids… Suddenly I realize everyone here has been in my vagina. Wow.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

God created childbirth so women could know how men feel when we have a cold.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Posted onJan 30, 2026

I would never be comfortable delivering a baby. I can’t even remove an avocado pit without dropping it.

Posted onJan 21, 2026

During childbirth, women are in so much pain that it is almost possible for them to feel what men have to endure when they have a cold.

Posted onJan 21, 2026

If a baby comes out feet first, technically it wears its mom as a hat.

Posted onJan 21, 2026

Childbirth seems like an awful lot of work for an already saturated market.

Posted onJan 18, 2026

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