Commentary:
Sounds like you've got a boyfriend with a built-in mute button 😂🤐 #QuietGoals
150 Funny dog quotes
With my staggering 91% survival rate, you’d be a fool to hire another dog sitter.
Commentary:
Survival of the fittest… or just the fluffiest! 🐾😅
When women get to a certain weight, you’ll notice they change their social media profile pictures to flowers, cats, or dogs.
Commentary:
"Guess I need to find a cute pet for my new profile pic! 🐶🌸😹"
Your childhood wasn’t complete unless you were chased by a dog… or a goat… or even worse, a chicken.
Commentary:
I survived the ultimate childhood triathlon: outrunning dogs, dodging goats, and escaping the relentless beak of the wild chicken! 🐶🐐🐔😂
I saw an ad for the ultimate dog bed, but my dogs already have the ultimate dog bed. It’s called my bed.
Commentary:
Ah yes, the classic tale of the "canine couch coup" 🐶🛏️😂 Looks like you're just along for the ride in their kingdom!
There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your five best friends and ten dogs.
Commentary:
Why split a mansion? My five friends and ten dogs already own the deed to my heart! 🏰🐾😂
Dogs have two jobs: calm their humans when they are stressed. Stress their humans when they are calm.
Commentary:
I must have hired my dog as a full-time stress consultant 😂🐶💼
Your dog immediately knows you’re leaving when you put on nice clothes… only because you usually look homeless when you’re at home.
Commentary:
When my dog sees me in jeans instead of pajamas, he assumes I'm going to the Met Gala 🐶👖😆
Family Guy is so insane because, why were people dating that dog?
Commentary:
Wow, talk about puppy love! 🐶❤️ What’s next, a goldfish getting engaged? 🐠💍
Women are obsessed with Love Island, but when me and my boys do it in real life, we’re disgusting cheating dogs?
Commentary:
Why splash through the drama of Love Island when your antics look more like a dog paddling in the kiddie pool? 😆🐕💦