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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Diabetes was the God of sugar.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

The best piece of dating advice I’ve ever received is “If they like you, you’ll know. If they don’t, you’ll be confused.” Honestly, it’s all you need to know.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

On a scale of quack to quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack, what do you think of my duck-based numbering system?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Back then, my parents were afraid of what I would do on the Internet. Today, I’m afraid of what my parents do on the Internet.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,005

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

The guy that said laughter is the best medicine obviously wasn’t suffering from diarrhea.

Spotted on Pinterest:

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Going viral on YouTube:

Sometimes I clean my room so dramatically, it feels like I’m erasing evidence.

Live now on Snapchat:

I was explaining to my Ukrainian colleague the phrase ‘There’s no such thing as a free lunch’. She told me the equivalent in Ukrainian is ‘The only free cheese is in the mousetrap’ — which is so much better.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Live now on Telegram:

Is it a good sign when your therapist keeps saying Ka-Ching?

Spotted on Twitch:

In the 90s, you could tell who won the rap battle by who was still alive.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

There is sex without love, there is love without sex, and there is me without both.

Seen just now on WeChat:

That awkward moment when you’re about to leave work and your boss says “before you go”.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not exhausted, that’s just your face now.

15 Funny festive quotes

Funny festive quotes bring a sprinkle of humor 🎉 and a dash of cheer 🎄 to holiday celebrations! Whether you’re decking the halls or wrapping gifts 🎁, a clever chuckle can make the season even brighter ✨. Get ready to laugh out loud 😂 and share the joy with friends and family as you dive into the funniest, quirkiest, and most relatable festive sayings around!

New funny festive quotes 👇

For even more funny festive quotes, hit next 👇

All funny festive quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

Unpopular opinion: we really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

50 shares on Reddit this month:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

43 shares on Instagram this month:

I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

28 shares on Facebook this month:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

36 shares on TikTok this month:

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” is all well and good until you’re rocking a tutu.

44 shares on YouTube this month:

Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

44 shares on Twitch this month:

Nobody bools anymore. In high school, everyone was booling.

85 shares on Snapchat this month:

Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

26 shares on Discord this month:

If you have any questions or concerns please don’t. Hesitate to ask.

70 shares on Threads this month:

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Showing up late with an iced coffee is not about poor time management, it’s about knowing how to make an entrance.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

How come all the single people don’t need no one, and all the married ones need two?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I have no desire to rekindle anything with anyone. See you never.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If a tree falls in a forest and doesn’t make a sound, maybe that’s where your kid should be practicing the piano.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Honestly, how women are drawn in a manga is typically (though not always) a good clue for what demographic a manga series is.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,011

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

When you think about it, Jesus really accomplished a lot in the four months between Christmas and Easter.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I make sure to post my political opinions after my selfies have gone viral to cull the herd.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I’m bringing back “holy moly” and nobody can stop me.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I don’t want to go.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

I think I’m about six months away from the perfect ‘before’ picture.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I don’t even want a new year this year. I’ll take a lightly used 2006, if it’s available.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

Making waves on Threads:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Shared recently on Facebook:

The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Playdates were invented to force parents into cleaning their home.

Just shared via Telegram:

White, black, yellow, brown, Democrat, Republican, man, woman, straight, gay, transgender, Jew, Christian, Muslim, young and old — you will all taste the same to the zombies.

Spotted on YouTube:

If white men can’t jump, how do you explain Super Mario?

Seen just now on Threads:

Sometimes being on your phone all day is your destiny.

Just shared via Telegram:

If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Just landed via Slack:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

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