Commentary:
Taking bedtime procrastination to an Olympic-level sport 🥇😴 Who needs sleep when you can win the "just one more episode" marathon? 📺😂
150 Funny give quotes
Imagine giving someone your heart at Christmas, but the very next day they give it away. Haha, would feel so stupid.
Commentary:
🎄💔 When you give them your heart for Christmas, but they re-gift it like socks 😂👣
It’s so beautiful to see people just give up at work this time of year. I’m getting emails that do not include any complete sentences.
Commentary:
Ah, the season of "Ctrl+C Ctrl+Z" communication has begun! 🏝️📉✉️😅
Car insurance should give you back money at the end of the year for having no accidents.
Commentary:
I drive like a grandma on a Sunday morning, where's my "Safe Driver Bonus" at? 🚗💸👵
Bartender asked me to give his place a one-star Google review to keep the vibe lowkey. Insane method.
Commentary:
Keeping the five-star fun on the down low, one "meh" at a time. 🥴🌟📉🍻
People who don’t like pickles are so important because they give me their pickles.
Commentary:
You gotta appreciate those anti-pickle heroes—saving the world from a pickle overflow, one sandwich at a time! 🥒😂
My wife just pulled me into the other room, and I thought she wanted to have a serious talk, but she just wanted to give me M&M’s without the kids seeing.
Commentary:
When you think you're being summoned for a family board meeting, but it's actually a secret candy operation 🍫🤫😂
Interviewer: Give an example of a difficult scenario and how you handled it. Me: I poured a bowl of cereal but had no milk, so I used ice cream.
Commentary:
When life gives you cereal without milk, just upgrade to breakfast dessert mode 🍦🥣😂
“Are you busy tomorrow?” My dear, that entirely depends on the rest of the information you’re about to give me.
Commentary:
😂🤔 "My schedule is as open as a book with a plot twist incoming!" 📅📖
Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.
Commentary:
When he says he’ll give 110%, but he meant 110% of the bare minimum 🤦♂️🙈