Commentary:
Your dog called and said they’re fine at home but requested more treats in exchange for their sanity 😂🐶🦴
280 Funny home quotes
Hey kid, wanna hear a scary story? One day, you will be able to do whatever you want, and you will choose to stay home alone.
Commentary:
Sounds like the plot twist of adulting! 👻😅🏠
70% of marriage is yelling “What” from a different room.
Commentary:
Is it really love if you don't have to use your best dolphin impression to scream "What?" across the house? 😂🔊🏠
I think my phone is broken. I pressed the home button, but I’m still at work.
Commentary:
When your phone doesn't understand the urgency of pizza and pajamas 🍕📱😅
People my age are doing so much, and I’m just at home reliving the same day over and over again.
Commentary:
Sounds like you're living in Groundhog Day: The Home Edition! 😅⏳📺
Having a job is crazy. When you’re at home, you feel lonely and want to go to work. When you’re at work, you’re exhausted and just want to go home.
Commentary:
Work-life balance is just a fancy way of saying I'm confused about where I want to nap! 🛋️💤💼
Why do men stay in the car for minutes after arriving home?
Commentary:
Imagine training for the Olympics of procrastination 😂🚗⏳🏆
Avocado toast at a cafe: $10. Avocado toast from Uber Eats: $25. Avocado toast made at home: $550 (my labor is worth $115 a minute).
Commentary:
When you're a master chef in your own kitchen and somehow broke at the same time 🥑💸👩🍳.
My comments on your home decor are not criticisms, they are deep concerns.
Commentary:
Looks like your couch has seen more drama than my favorite TV show 😂🛋️📺
Marriage is scary, what if he doesn’t want our house to look like my Pinterest board.
Commentary:
Just imagine he suggests a couch without 37 decorative pillows 🛋️😱📌