Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

We argue about where to go for dinner for so long, it eventually becomes an argument on where to go for breakfast.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

The woman that cleaned my house could make a lot of money by threatening to release the before and after photos.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Never underestimate my ability to stare out a window and not speak for hours on a car ride.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Whoever has designed parking garages is either an architectural genius or an evil sadist.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Sometimes somebody will share something from way back in my timeline, and I’ll think, “Oh God, what all did they see to get there?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Jan 2, 2026

3,418

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Slack:

Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Live now on Reddit:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re excited about your organized fridge.

Going viral on X:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Sorry for running at you on all fours, I was excited to see you.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Making waves on Telegram:

If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”

Just landed via TikTok:

Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here playing with my arm fat.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Therapy is life letting you speak to the manager.

Funny lawn quotes

Funny lawn quotes 🌿 bring a fresh breeze of humor to your garden chores! Whether you’re battling weeds or just admiring that perfect green carpet, these witty lines will make mowing and trimming way more entertaining 😂✂️. Get ready to chuckle as you turn your yard work into a laugh-filled adventure 🌱🎉!

New funny lawn quotes 👇

Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

0

2 months ago

ask, communication, dinner, free, household, humor, lawn, lawn mower, marriage, mower, mowing, multitasking, ready, relationship, tip, while, wife
Marriage tip: If your wife goes silent in the middle of an argument, you probably shouldn’t ask if you can go back to mowing the lawn.

0

2 months ago

argument, ask, back, communication, humor, lawn, marriage, middle, mowing, relationship, silence, silent, tip, wife
Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

0

2 months ago

adult, adult life, humor, lawn, life, mowing, neighbor, peer, peer pressure, pressure, seeing, social, social pressure
You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

0

2 months ago

annoyance, bad, bad day, day, distraction, having, humor, irritation, lawn, life, morning, mowing, someone, start, worst
Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

0

2 months ago

communication, day, expression, getting, humor, i, know, lawn, lawn sign, opinion, people, sign, think, today
It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

0

2 months ago

always, annoying, around, guy, humor, just, lawn, man, me, morning, mowing, sleep, wake, wake up
I need a new hobby that costs zero dollars and takes up 100% of my free time. So far, all I’ve come up with is mowing the lawn.

0

5 months ago

activity, cost, costs, dollars, free, free time, hobby, i, lawn, management, mowing, need, new, time, time management, zero

All funny lawn quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

67 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s important to remember that even parents make mistakes. In fact, it’s how many of us became parents.

36 shares on Twitch this month:

Instagram is literally just screenshots of Twitter.

27 shares on X this month:

All these galaxies and planets, and we ended up on the one with 40 hour work weeks.

65 shares on Slack this month:

Deleting dating apps to meet someone the old-fashioned way (in the HR department).

45 shares on Discord this month:

God, please, for once in my life, let me get what I want.

43 shares on Facebook this month:

You ask a girl if she ate, and she gon say, “Yeah, I had my coffee.”

92 shares on Instagram this month:

Just done a HIIT workout and if anyone sees me trying to do that again just go ahead and hiit me in the face.

38 shares on Reddit this month:

Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

45 shares on Discord this month:

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The older I get, the more I walk like Charlie Chaplin.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Them: You post a lot. What am I supposed to do here – fold laundry on the timeline?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m getting to the age where it’s rude to pull out a bottle of ibuprofen if I don’t have enough for everyone.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody supports you like that one internet friend you’ve never met.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Coffee is just goth water.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Sexting is hilarious, when you think about it. Like, this email truly should’ve been a meeting.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

And where did Mr. Pepper receive his degree from exactly?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Prime numbers are so cunty. Like okay, diva — only divisible by yourself?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Driving a newer car is like “Oh weird, this one doesn’t have Shake on Highway, maybe they stopped making that feature”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,597

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Can’t, holding a grudge.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Do you mind if I smash this object of great sentimental value?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

You can’t stop me. My tampon wrapper told me I was bold and brilliant.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Got asked to be a godparent, proving God has lowered his recruitment standards.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Me as the therapist: “Listen, just take a nap!”

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Offering people sitting on the bus my standing room. Like it’s better.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Couldn’t afford a man cave. Had to settle for a gazebro.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Some days you’re the quick brown fox and other days you’re the lazy dog.

Just landed via WeChat:

Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

Spotted on Reddit:

What would boomers do without their paper shredder?

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

Just shared via YouTube:

The actors you see in movies are probably home by now.

Spotted on Threads:

Don’t invite me anywhere last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Festival is when you pay a fortune to live like a homeless person.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Every triangle is a love triangle when you love triangles.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

Live now on Messenger:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re excited about your organized fridge.

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