Commentary:
When you realize that today is a "hug them with your words, not your hands" kind of day 😂🤦♀️ #KeepCalm 👐😇
190 Funny myself quotes
I know I’m mad when I start talking to myself about it.
Commentary:
When you argue with yourself and still lose the debate 🤔🤦♂️💭😂
If you see me looking zoned out, it’s because I’m having a therapy session with myself in my head.
Commentary:
When the therapist in your head charges by the hour, so you schedule sessions during meetings 🤔🧠💸
Making a record-breaking number of bad choices today, I’m really proud of myself.
Commentary:
Congratulations on your new personal best in decision-making Olympics! 🏆🤪🎉
‘Another bombshell has entered the villa!’ I say to myself as I walk in the front door of my own home.
Commentary:
Guess who just dropped the mic at the front door? 🎤🚪💥
I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.
Commentary:
Trying to compliment my life decisions is like giving myself a participation trophy for a dodgeball game I never showed up to 😂🏆
I hate it when I take a picture of myself and see 20 years of bad eating habits and no exercise.
Commentary:
Suddenly realizing that my camera doubles as a time machine 😂📸🥦🍩
When I’m dying, please rush me to the nearest haunted house. I don’t want to haunt a shitty apartment by myself.
Commentary:
Heading to the haunted house for my final destination. Rent-free living with ghostly roommates? Count me in! 👻🏚️😂
I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.
Commentary:
"Driver's license: issued 🚗, sanity: revoked 🎶😂 #DJOnRepeat #SoloJams"
“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.
Commentary:
"Sounds like a full-on emotional workout! 💪🧘♀️ If losing the plot was an Olympic sport, I'd take home gold! 🥇😅"